Living In Thailand Blog
Wednesday 16th March 2011
Despite my advancing age I am still sometimes very naive about certain things, especially those situations in which I have not had previous experience.
Getting prepared for the birth of our daughter took a lot of work and I naively thought that after the birth it would be a bit more relaxed. Of course it isn't. The baby is entirely dependent on her mother, and her mother is entirely dependent on other people.
Most of the time 'other people' means me. Every time I think I have 10 minutes free to sit down at my computer, Bpom wants me to do something or to go out to buy something. This has been compounded by the fact that our daughter has a small problem and we still need to make regular visits to the hospital.
Still, as a man I have got it relatively easy. When you experience firsthand what a woman has to go through to give birth you start to realise why mothers are so cherished in Thailand. In Thailand everyone carries a debt of gratitude to their mother that continues throughout their lifetime and can never be repaid.
The whole experience has been quite humbling. I criticise certain things in Thailand and I will continue to do so because these things are wrong. However, apart from a bad diagnosis or two I have only ever offered praise for the Thai healthcare system.
Last week only reinforced my positive feelings. If I had to criticise anything it would be only be a lack of information immediately after the birth regarding what we needed to do about our daughter's complication. Obviously we were very concerned and wanted quick answers but these weren't forthcoming.
It's just Thailand. Thais are never in a hurry and even though you get used to it there are certain occasions when it can be quite frustrating.
Every nurse and doctor we have seen has been incredible. There is a genuine deep affection for children and taking care of others is a big part of the Thai character. The dedication of Thailand's health professionals really shines through.
The lack of good employment opportunities in Thailand might make a career in medicine and healthcare more attractive than it is in other countries, but even the nurses who don't earn very much are as dedicated as the top doctors who do.
The specialist doctor we are now seeing is a wonderful lady (many doctors and dentists in Thailand are female and they are very, very good).
As far as I can work out, the Prince of Songkla hospital in Hat Yai is the top facility in southern Thailand. Regional hospitals do a good job but they are limited in what they can do. When they reach their limit they then transfer patients to Mor Or (as it is known).
I met a Canadian guy a few years ago who was living in Nakhon Sri Thammarat with his Thai wife who had developed cancer. They had to travel to Mor Or for treatment.
The clinic we attended for the first time last week was treating patients from all over the south of Thailand and had been running all day. We went down at 9pm and came out at 11:30pm. The doctors and nurses must have been exhausted but they didn't show it.
Instead, the doctor was cracking jokes, keeping her young patients amused, treating patients, completing medical records, and at the same time teaching about a dozen 5th year medical students. As I said, it was all quite humbling.
My parents have also been here for six days and it was great to see them - and for them to see their new granddaughter - but it created more work for me. My Mum left in floods of tears yesterday. Ever since she had kids she has wanted grandkids but we kept her waiting a long time and when we finally produced a couple, one is in Singapore and one is in Thailand.
I feel sorry for her but my folks won't move out here and both myself and my brother will not give up the lifestyles we have in Southeast Asia. We both know we are better off here than we would be back in England.
My parents updated me on the gossip and events in England and there is nothing I miss. The winter weather is lousy, everything is so expensive and my cousin's eldest son was beaten up recently for no reason at all. There are many aspects of English 'culture' that I certainly don't miss.
When I moved from my rented apartment last year, the house we are in now seemed massive. However, just six months later we have outgrown it. The second bedroom is used for lots of things and thus it isn't a proper guest room. The temporary bed I set up for my parents wasn't comfortable and we really need a proper guest room.
The baby's gear is everywhere and we really need a dedicated room for her. I would also like to set up a portrait studio so ideally we would need four bedrooms. Detached four-bedroom houses aren't necessarily expensive in Thailand but finding one in an area that is convenient and doesn't flood is a little trickier.
I looked at some yesterday on the way back from the airport and although flooding wasn't a problem, there was absolutely nothing around so the location wasn't that convenient.
When Thais buy houses it seems that they always prefer new houses. The housing market for houses that have already been lived in seems slow and it can take a long time to sell. The big six-bedroom mansion with a swimming pool that my brother has just bought in Phuket was on the market for five years apparently. With this in mind, I want to make sure that I buy the right place because I don't want the headache of trying to sell a house.
In this area there are lots of new housing developments but I'm not sure that I want to stay here. Ideally I would like to live somewhere that is quieter and prettier but not near the sea and all the farang tourists.
Finding somewhere suitable is next on my list of things to do once I get some free time.
It was while Bpom was still in hospital after the birth that we first heard of the earthquake in Japan. It came after some of the worst flooding the world has seen for a long time (especially in Australia), and a horrendous earthquake in New Zealand.
The worst natural disaster I have been through was last November during our big flood but seeing what happened in Japan puts things in perspective. I guess the damage cost me about Bt30,000, it was very inconvenient for a while, and there was a lot of cleaning up to do afterwards.
However, the house was still standing, there was no loss of life, and the majority of our things were left untouched. To see entire villages 'wiped from the map' (as the BBC put it) makes me think how lucky we were.
I asked my Dad if he could remember a series of events like we've had recently in his lifetime. He lived through WW2 as a young child, which was a very unfortunate but exceptional event, but he couldn't remember anything quite as bad.
I still think that despite these terrible tragedies the world will somehow become a better place. It pains me to see how much countries spend on 'defence' and how much we spend as a race developing weapons to destroy each other.
Human nature is always at its best when we pull together to help each other. This is always evident whenever there is a global tragedy and evident on a personal level when we run into problems.
After the birth last week Bpom and I were desperate to do something for our daughter but neither of us had the skills or knowledge. We handed over Ellie to people who had devoted their lives to helping other people - either the doctors and nurses or the clever people we never see who design and manufacture the equipment that medical professionals use.
While at the hospital I also became aware of the massive behind-the-scenes effort it takes to keep a big hospital running smoothly. From feeding the staff and patients, doing the laundry and cleaning, keeping all the equipment running, taking care of the accounts, etc., etc., it is a massive effort.
I will say it again: last week was very humbling.
Japan now faces huge problems and the world will help. Wouldn't it be a wonderful thing if after the rebuilding is finished we continued to help each other instead of fighting, squabbling and killing? If we used all the money and clever minds to do good instead of making weapons the world would be such a better place.
There you go. I'm being hopelessly naive again. This is a big problem that I have.
I'm not superstitious but with all the predictions about what might happen in 2012 it is a little eerie to see what is happening in the lead up to that date.
Maybe, as some have predicted, we really are entering a new era of consciousness. I hope so because if we don't change I don't have a lot of hope for the world my daughter will grow up in.
On a closing note, the locals have been absolutely wonderful this past week. I know I've written a lot recently about the negative aspects of Thailand but this week has been great.
My parents are getting old but because I live in a residential area where I've never seen another farang they have been treated like superstars. People walking by have just stopped to chat and they've made my folks feel really welcome.
The reaction to the baby has been equally as good and, again, I can't give enough thanks to all the doctors and nurses we've seen for their dedication, care and professionalism.
Sure, as we've been driving back and forth to the hospital I've still had to deal with obnoxious Thai road users in their pickup trucks and those who park their cars wherever they want because it's convenient for them even though it's inconvenient for everyone else, but with all the good we've experienced this week it has been easier to ignore selfish, inconsiderate Thais.
Monday 7th March 2011
I quizzed Bpom about what would happen - horror of horrors - if our child wasn't born on a Tuesday or Sunday, as recommended by her friend's astrological charts. The reply was that being born on any other day will affect the relationship between child and parents.
A Tuesday or Friday birth is fine but if he or she is born on any other day then there will be arguments all the time between child and parents. Mmmm.
Today is the original expected arrival date but the baby seems quite comfortable and shows no sign of wanting to enter the world. The doctor told us he will induce the birth tomorrow.
Now that Bpom knows the birth date, her sister is in the process of looking into more astrological charts and special books on the subject to determine the most auspicious 'real' name for the child.
Thais normally just use a short nickname but they all have long 'real' names (official first names) which they use formally. It's quite normal to know Thais by their nickname only and not to know their real name or surname. Surnames are a relatively new phenomenon in Thailand. Not so long ago no one had a surname.
I don't suppose it will be very long after the birth that we will start visiting temples and monks to perform more superstitious rituals.
My reaction to all this stuff is to raise my eyebrows and stare upwards to the sky. Thais, on the other hand, take it more seriously than anything else.
As I've said before, the Thai animist belief system predates Buddhism by thousands of years and probably goes back to a time when mammoths roamed the globe.
We are now in the 21st Century but if you live in Thailand this is what you have to deal with all the time.
Just after this story broke:
130 M16's, other guns stolen from Army depot
This happens:
Masked attackers spray crowd with machine guns (also AK47's and M16's)
After I arrived in this part of Thailand it was my intention to explore Yala, Narathiwat and Pattani. That was in November 2003. In January 2004 a new wave of insurgency began (the original problems go back much further) that continues to this day.
As a result my travel plans got dropped and I still haven't set foot in the 'three provinces'. I've heard some good things about places such as Betong in Yala province and I've visited some pretty areas in Satun near the Malaysian border, for example Thaleban National Park.
I'd still like to go but there is undoubtedly some risk involved. I don't believe that I would be targeted as a farang. Some of the insurgents might still hold grudges about the Peninsula's colonial past but their main gripes are with the Thai government and Buddhist Thais.
One Buddhist monk killed, another injured along with novice in Pattani
The problem is that most of the attacks I read about are entirely indiscriminate. No one is targeted as such, but anyone who is in the wrong place at the wrong time could be a victim.
Various attempts have been made by the Thai government to end the problems but so far nothing has been successful. I know a little about the situation but not a great deal.
Many Thais working in Hat Yai come from the three provinces (and quite a few have moved to Songkhla province permanently). They go back to their home towns regularly and tell me that there isn't a problem.
I would imagine that visits would be fine 99 times out of a hundred but there is always that small chance that it could be you who is in the wrong place at the wrong time. I have therefore put my plans to visit the south on hold until the situation improves.
I've written about this before. After the 'dream' comes true and foreigners who have only ever experienced Thailand on vacations move to the Land of Smiles to live, quite a few end up taking their own lives.
Depression and alcoholism are a problem for some, and one of the most popular methods to end it all is to find a tall building from which to perform the 'Pattaya Death Leap'.
I've experienced Thailand as a naive, unknowing tourist and I know how alluring it all seems. Thailand seems perfect and it can easily seduce many foreign men. The country can become an obsession.
I've also experienced moving to Thailand and I've experienced going through that difficult stage of having the rose-coloured glasses removed and seeing Thailand for what it really is. It's not a bad country but a lot of what goes on isn't very pleasant.
It's an extremely harsh, unforgiving country. If you come with nothing and expect to find an employer or someone else to take care of you, forget it. Foreigners in Thailand are useful for when there is a need but there is no loyalty and you will be dropped as soon as you have served a purpose.
Thailand is a great place if you have money but a lousy place if you don't. A few exceptional people can make lots of money in Thailand but my advice would be to ensure you have sufficient funds of your own before you make the move. Any money I have ever earnt in Thailand has simply been a bonus and never my main source of income.
As a foreigner you will be targeted by lots of Thais who believe you are rich and want a slice of your wealth. Be very careful. There are also other foreigners in the country who you need to be wary of.
You will also need something productive to do, whether it is working or some other activity. A combination of not having enough to do and having too much time to spend in the bars is the start of the slippery slope.
If you doubt any of this, ask yourself why so many foreigners take their own lives in Thailand.
Sunday 6th March 2011
The way most Thais think is fundamentally different to the way most Westerners think. It should never be underestimated if you visit or live in Thailand.
I am a worrier. I always have been. I can't change how I am even though I know that 99% of things people worry about never happen. It's just an unnecessary waste of mental energy.
After arriving in Thailand I realised that the Thai attitude was not to worry about anything, but just to deal with anything that goes wrong. I agree - to a certain extent - but not worrying about anything at all does mean that problems will occur that could have been prevented.
The way that Thais drive is a classic example. Any Westerner can see that the way Thais drive will lead to lots of road deaths (which it does) but no one worries and no one seems bothered about preventing problems in the future.
This is possibly because of a sense of fatalism in the belief system - what will happen will happen and fate can't be changed.
Bpom is due to give birth at any time now and we spent all yesterday morning in the hospital labour room and at her doctor's private maternity clinic.
While waiting in the clinic I noticed an unattended bag outside leaning against the window. The three provinces adjacent to us have been involved in a long running insurgency and Hat Yai has also been a terrorist target on occasions.
With this in mind, and considering the size of the bag and what it could possibly have contained, an unattended bag should have had a lot of people worried.
Of course, this is Thailand and the only person worried was me.
I got up and spoke to the clinic receptionist as I believed it was the correct thing to do in this particular situation. Bpom was embarrassed at what I'd done, as was the receptionist who replied to me that she didn't know whose bag it was either. There was also some embarrassed laughter from other people in the clinic.
Another woman waiting to see the doctor then piped up that it was her bag. She obviously had no idea that leaving a bag unattended in public could cause any kind of a problem. If she ever gets the chance to travel abroad she might find that she inadvertently closes an airport temporarily and gets arrested, but - as I said - the Thai way is not to worry about anything.
What exactly do Thais worry about? The bag incident and road accidents are examples of things that Thais don't worry about but obviously they do worry about certain things.
Bpom was concerned yesterday about whether our child will be a pee (relatively older person) or a nong (relatively younger person) to my brother's daughter. Charlotte is already three and a half so she should be the pee but she is the daughter of my younger brother (my nong) so does this mean that Charlotte should also be a nong to our, as yet unborn, child?
Bpom has seven elder brothers and sisters who are all younger than me. As I am older I should be the pee but because I am married to the youngest child I am a nong. I guess I'm a kind of nong-in-law.
The other thing Bpom is really concerned about is on which day the child will be born. One of her friends is into all the astrological nonsense and told her that Tuesday or Sunday would be best.
The child is expected on Monday but if he or she doesn't arrive the doctor was going to induce the birth on Friday. These two days didn't fit into the plan so Bpom got him to change the day to Tuesday.
I've also been quizzed about my exact time of birth but my memories of being born are now a bit vague. I know the year and date (useful for application forms); I even know the day; but I don't have a clue about the time. I'll have to ask my Mum.
When you live with Thais this is the kind of thing you get all the time. They don't worry at all about the things you think they should worry about but relative relationships, forms of personal address, relative status, superstitions and astrology are all vitally important.
Thais. At times they frustrate the hell out of you but you have to love them. Despite all their strange ways and beliefs they have this horrible habit of being quite endearing.
Finally today, here are my writing assistants, our two Japanese Bobtails (although one is sans bobtail).
Saturday 5th March 2011
The digital thermometer in our bedroom (a north-facing room that receives no direct sunlight at all) reads somewhere around 30°C all the time. During the hot season it might be 30°C at night and 33°C during the day time. During the rainy season it dips a little.
Northern Thailand has three seasons, one of them being a genuine cool season, but southern Thailand only has two. Down here in the south it's either hot and wet or hot and dry.
According to this BBC article, anything above 24°C can increase the risk of strokes and heart attacks. Even when we run our air-conditioner it is only set to bring the temperature down to 26°C.
I am not very tolerant to extremes of temperature - hot or cold. The constant heat is something that doesn't suit me at all, but nowhere is perfect. It is something that you get used to and it is probably easier to deal with than constant cold temperatures.
I haven't been back to the UK since I moved to Thailand at the end of 2003 but when I do, eventually, I know I will find it very cold.
I brought a light fleece with me from England but the only time I have had a need to wear it is on the overnight bus from Thailand to Singapore because the drivers insist on cranking up the A/C to full and it actually gets quite cold at night.
Feeling a little better yesterday, I went to get another haircut at the place I discovered recently. I had to wait for a while this time because there were three men in the queue ahead of me but it gave me a chance to make some more observations.
There is a strict queueing system. Everyone who turns up has to wait their turn. You can't turn up, book your place in the queue, leave and go back again.
The first observation was that Thai men don't tip. The men ahead of me each gave her Bt100 and pocketed their Bt40 change. I still gave her a tip but reduced it to Bt20 from the Bt40 last time. Bt20 isn't much but it seems to be Bt20 more than she usually gets.
The shop is basic, at best. I thought the rent would be around Bt1,500 per month but it's actually Bt1,000.
She is very efficient and goes through a set routine with every customer. Each cut takes almost exactly 20 minutes. There is a constant queue of customers and she works continually. Working for Bt180 an hour isn't much but considering that rice field workers work for Bt150 a day or less, it's not bad for Thailand.
She seems to have a good reputation and a lot of regular customers.
Hygiene levels are about the same as in small restaurants in Thailand. The same towel is put around every customer's shoulders, the same cutthroat razor is used with each customer, and nothing is sterilised.
After giving you a shave she dabs your face with cotton wool soaked in pure alcohol. It stings a little but once you get used to the sensation it feels quite refreshing and I guess it takes care of any germs from previous customers.
Just like the cheap hole-in-the-wall restaurants, the lax hygiene practices don't appear to cause a problem. Some of the small restaurants I've eaten at in Thailand have looked disgusting but I haven't suffered any tummy problems from these places.
She's quite an expert with the cutthroat razor. No nicks, no cuts, no blood and I've never had a closer shave in my life. After she has done her stuff your face really does feel as smooth as the proverbial baby's bottom.
The shop is closed on Wednesdays, of course, because superstitious Thais believe it is bad luck to get your hair cut on a Wednesday. If anyone knows the origin of this particular superstition I would love to know why.
Friday 4th March 2011
My health has been fairly good in Thailand but whenever I get something the symptoms always seem to be a lot worse than I can remember in the UK.
My brother-in-law had a win on the lottery last week (about Bt300,000) and took the family out for a meal on Wednesday night. On these occasions I have often noticed that the sexes separate. Instead of being allowed to sit with my wife, I was put on the men's table while she sat with the women and children.
Thai men - being the macho creatures they are - need to reinforce their manhood at all times and this means drinking lots of whisky (despite the fact they were all driving) and smoking. I was doing neither.
I hate cigarette smoke with a passion and after we got home my throat wasn't feeling good at all. By the morning my sore throat had developed into a deep, productive cough along with a very painful chest every time I coughed. I felt really terrible and headed for the hospital.
My experience with doctors and dentists here has been mostly positive. One doctor in Chumpon told me I had a perforated eardrum some years ago when the problem was only some earwax, but apart from that the diagnoses and treatments have been fine.
The doctor yesterday told me I had bronchitis; something I've never had before. He gave me about five different kinds of drug (prescribing lots of medicine is normal here) and sent me home to rest.
Last night was really bad. I was in a lot of pain, I couldn't sleep, and I thought that I might have to go back to the hospital to be admitted. However, I managed to get some sleep late this morning and now feel a lot better.
I used my private health insurance yesterday but the Bt1,000 per day limit for out-patient visits is never enough. Every time I go to the hospital the bill is more than Bt1,000 and I have to pay extra. I think next year I will ask the insurance company to increase the limit to Bt2,000 per day (which will mean a more expensive policy, of course).
I've had private health insurance here for several years and every year the policy has cost me more than my medical bills. I would have saved a lot of money by not having insurance.
However, my reason for having health insurance is so that I am covered in the event of a very serious illness or accident. I hope it never happens but having the insurance at least gives me some peace of mind. There are some nasty diseases here and then, of course, there are Thai drivers.
With all the unlicensed firearms that already exist in Thailand, it is concerning how often firearms are stolen from the military. Thefts from military installations occur quite frequently and we're not talking about air pistols. In this latest incident the weapons stolen included M16 assault rifles, mortars and 11mm pistols.
130 M16s, other guns stolen from Army depot
Thursday 3rd March 2011
I never understood how a single currency in Europe could work. The protaganists were always telling us (naively) how easy it would be not to have to exchange money when we crossed borders but a common currency meant a common interest rate and with the countries in the Euro zone being so very different I just couldn't see how any single interest rate would be suitable for all countries at the same time.
A common currency also takes away the ability for individual countries to strengthen or weaken their currency )as they could have done when they had a sovereign currency) in order to suit prevailing economic conditions.
Japan implemented a zero interest rate policy about 10 years ago and the US and UK are currently using the lowest interest rates that have ever been used (0.25% and 0.5% respectively).
Meanwhile, Brazil has just increased its interest rate to 11.75% to try to halt spiralling inflation.
Brazil raises interest rates to 11.75%
I'm not an economist but I don't think you need to be. It's just common sense - something, it seems, was lacking with a lot of pro-Euro politicians.
The majority of the UK electorate - sensibly - has always been against. A few airhead politicians have been in favour but as long as the government honours its promise to have a referendum on the subject I don't think it will ever happen.
Events in Europe during the last couple of years, especially with the PIGS (Portugal, Ireland, Greece and Spain - PIIGS if you include Italy) justify any doubts the British may have had.
There has been talk about an ASEAN common currency. Thailand, Indonesia and the Philippines seem quite keen but I think that Singapore might have a few reservations.
The diversity between countries in Southeast Asia is probably greater than in Europe, for example, if you compare Singapore to Burma. In fact, if you compare Singapore to any other country in the region.
Tuesday 1st March 2011
I have very few teaching commitments now until the beginning of April and then I will have none at all. My mood has lifted quite a lot. I wasn't aware that teaching was making me that unhappy but I guess it must have been.
There's no pressure as such, but it has a kind of long term drip effect. Lots of little things keep happening that piss you off and although no one thing is of any great consequence, after a while the accumulation of so many little things starts to become quite a burden.
I'm glad it's almost over.
This week has been good so far. As I arrived home yesterday morning after taking the wife to work, the mosquito men (there were two of them) were back spraying the Soi.
The mosquito problem had reached almost plague proportions. The little Chinese electric mosquito killer that I wrote about on 18th February has been working overtime and every morning it is full of dead mosquitos. In addition, I've also been having to spray to get rid of all the ones it didn't electrocute. One day last week there must have been 150 in our downstairs front room.
When I checked this morning (after the men from the municipality came yesterday) there were only about 30 in total - a significant reduction.
Thais will often adopt a kind of fatalistic attitude that what will happen will happen and nothing can be done, but most of the time things can be done.
Anyway, I am pleased that the mosquito men came back and I hope to see them again very soon.
I mentioned recently that the local immigration office underwent a major change a couple of years ago and now the service is very good. Half jokingly, I suggested that they should put the man in charge of immigration in charge of the local traffic police.
Well, I think it happened this week. The traffic police have been going nuts all over town and they even stopped and fined some stupid farang guy for driving his Ford Escape at 65kmh in a 60kmh zone! The idiot had to pay Bt300 which serves him right.
I have been here over seven years and I have never seen traffic police take any action apart from setting up road blocks and checking motorcyclists for crash helmets, documentation and drugs.
They are now stopping people for speeding and driving through red lights. Motorcyclists here drive through red lights all the time.
This is something else that I'm really pleased to see and I hope it will be permanent.
Two taps in our house needed changing. I bought the replacements but couldn't be bothered to change them myself. In an emergency - or if the alternative was paying UK plumbing rates - I could change them myself but whenever I do these jobs it is never straightforward.
There's always a leak the first time so I have to do everything again, and inevitably I always find I am missing something and need to drive all the way to Home Pro.
I called the same plumber who unblocked one of our drains the other week and he sent one of his young assistants to the house. The young lad changed both taps in about 20 minutes, there were no problems, and he charged me Bt150.
Labour is very cheap in Thailand and for many jobs it isn't worth doing them yourself. The only problem I have found is getting tradesmen that you can trust and rely on. This particular plumber seems to be pretty good.
We've had our cats for about three months and they haven't been vaccinated yet. They're quite a handful and I wasn't looking forward to putting them in a basket and taking them to the vets.
Our maid told us about a mobile vet who makes house calls. He came today. He checked each cat and diagnosed a hereditary lung condition with one (which isn't serious), and a worm problem with the other. He said that worm larvae can be transmitted to cats by mosquito bites.
He vaccinated each cat, gave the male a worm shot, and injected the female to stop her getting pregnant (which could be a problem very soon). The house call, the check up and two shots for each cat was only Bt560.
It's been a long time since I took a cat to the vet in the UK but I imagine (like everything else in the UK these days) that it isn't cheap.