Living In Thailand Blog
Friday 10th November 2006
What is it about Thais and money? Some of the happiest and kindest Thais I have met have also been some of the poorest. They live in what is basically shanty accommodation but they have food, the men have some alcohol, they've got their Thai music, their friends and family, and they have a fine old time. I have also found these people to be very generous with what little they have.
On the other hand, some of the nastiest, meanest Thais I've met have been fairly wealthy. My last landlord lives in a huge house with 10 rooms to rent out which gives him another income on top of his day job salary. His wife also works. They have two cars, no kids and take vacations abroad.
He's not a nice man though and is incredibly mean (kee niaow maak). My rent was expensive but even so, he was always looking at ways to screw a few more Baht out of me. The final straw was when he doubled my phone bill unexpectedly one month to get more money. He didn't tell me and I realised later that he had actually broken the signed contract.
It wasn't a huge amount of money but it was the principle of the matter. He already had a lot of money and I was paying him a lot of rent but he still wanted more. A Chinese Thai, he reminded me very much of Thaksin.
He was a sneaky guy. When some new residents arrived I was told not to tell them what I paid for electricity and water because he had raised the rates for them. He kept an eye on what other apartments around town were charging for facilities and his prices always matched the most expensive rates elsewhere.
I was one of the first residents and paid what he asked and it was a lot of money. The other rooms stayed vacant for a long time. Some more people turned up eventually but I always suspected he had lowered the rent and told them not to tell me.
However, when it came to providing extra facilities like the other places did, he wasn't interested because of the additional expense. There was no cable TV and no cheap Internet. I was forced to use a dial-up line for the Internet which was slow and expensive.
The owner of a restaurant that I used to visit regularly knew him and told me how tight he was. He would only ever order set meals that were on a special promotion. Occasionally he would come to the restaurant for a Bt15 drink and ask for a discount.
I found another place to stay and told him I was moving. He was furious but what was surprising is that he didn't seem to have a clue why I had moved. His penny-pinching eventually lost him a big chunk of rent revenue and I knew that he would have difficulty finding a new tenant because of the high rent.
Money spoils people but it really seems to spoil the Thais. Not all people, I hasten to add. I have met a fair number of wealthy Thais - mostly from the medical profession, interestingly - who have been very generous and kind-hearted.
This morning I saw the story about the Thai coup leaders awarding themselves pay increases and couldn't believe it. These are not corrupt soldiers from a banana republic; they are highly respected men who did the right thing for Thailand. What they have done though just isn't right.
Thaksin was the man who was going to fight corruption in Thailand but he turned out to be more corrupt than anyone else. He may have changed the nature of corruption in Thailand, but corruption it was, nonetheless.
Not so long ago in feudal Siam, it was standard practice for men in positions of power to skim something off the top for themselves. This practice was an normal as breathing air. No one thought anything of it and there wasn't even a word for corruption.
During his reign, King Rama V started to introduce Western practices of government administration into Thailand and this practice was something that he tried to stamp out. The problem though, is that it is so ingrained in Thai culture that Thais - even now - just don't seem to be able to accept there is anything wrong with it.
I'm sure that the reason corruption is so widespread in the country is because many people still do not regard what they are doing as corruption. The coup leaders, for example, are only rewarding themselves for getting rid of corruption by getting rid of Thaksin. But isn't what they have done corrupt as well? Obviously, they don't see it that way.
When I first moved into my old apartment I was pleased with the living space and I gave some good feedback to the landlord. When he tried to screw some more money out of me later, wasn't he just rewarding himself for providing a farang with a nice room? He, also, didn't believe he was doing anything wrong.
It's another subject which looks bad and is easy to condemn from a Westerner's perspective but that's only because the vast majority of Westerners do not understand Thai culture.
As I have stated elsewhere, Thai and Western cultural differences are not superficial. It is not just a case of eating with a spoon and fork instead of a knife and fork or wai-ing instead of shaking hands. There is a completely different value system operating in Thailand and if you deal with Thais or live in Thailand it is not to be underestimated.
This is not a good country in which to live if you like cats. I wrote recently about an abandoned kitten I tried to rescue in Sukhothai. By rescue I just mean I was trying to get it out of harm's way into an environment where it might stand a chance of surviving.
A number of restaurants I use keep (or have kept) cats and just as I get to know the people at the restaurants, I also get to know the cats. It's not unusual to find one day that the cat is no more. "Dtaay lair-o," they tell me. It's dead.
One particularly gorgeous chocolate point Siamese died of eating rat poison but more commonly they are killed by being hit by cars or motorbikes.
I have so far resisted the temptation to bring abandoned cats back to my apartment but we looked after a kitten two nights ago that Iss found abandoned outside her shop. The poor thing was only about a month old and must have been terrified.
She took it to a vet for vaccinations (which cost Bt230) and brought it home for the night. We fed it and tried to make it comfortable but it cried continuously. I think this is a programmed response at that age just to call out for their mothers but this one was never going to be reunited with its mother again. The following day Iss took it to her aunt's house.
I was in a sawng-thaew today and we were waiting at a set of traffic lights. There was a pickup truck behind us and I was idly gazing at the front of the truck. Just as the lights changed and the traffic started to move, a tiny kitten jumped down from the engine bay.
No doubt, it had climbed up inside while the truck had been parked but had then been taken on an involuntary ride. My first reaction was to jump out and get the cat but Thais do not accelerate away from traffic lights gently.
The traffic roared off at rate of knots and it was a busy road at the start of the Friday evening rush hour. My reaction caused quite a panic among the Thai passengers who hadn't seen the kitten. I didn't see the cat again.
For all I know it was flattened by the pickup truck's rear wheel two seconds later or by another vehicle. It would have needed a miracle to escape death.
Animals breed completely unchecked here and as a result there are stray cats and dogs everywhere. Many die or get into difficulties and for animal lovers it can be quite distressing to see what goes on.
My Thai friend who now lives in London called me this morning. She has lived in England for a long time and has a British husband and passport but is currently back in Thailand for a holiday and to visit her family in Chiang Mai.
Just as I sometimes think I was born in the wrong place, it is the same for her. She is the most un-Thai Thai I have ever met and none of the general observations I have made about Thais apply to her.
I wanted to know when she is coming back to Thailand again and she told me that she doesn't want to come back. It's s combination of many things but after living in the UK for a long time and seeing how things can be, she is fed up with how things are in Thailand.
We talked about the stupid bureaucracy, which is something I have been fighting with recently, but it didn't stop there. She told me that she had been along to the International Horticultural Exposition several times as it is located just a short distance from her parent's house.
This is the big, three month exposition set up as part of the sixtieth anniversary celebrations of the King's accession to the throne. Many Thais I know in the south want to visit and by all accounts it is a magnificent event.
What had upset June was seeing so many Thais walking over grassed areas with signs that clearly told people to keep off. They were spoiling the exhibits for future visitors but they didn't care. This is the kind of thing that most Westerners do respect but many Thais don't. She mentioned it to a few people and their response was they had seen the sign but so what?
Now, this is very Thai. Those signs meant nothing more than red traffic lights, pedestrian crossings or no-smoking signs. People probably know what they are there for but feel no need to comply with either the law or polite requests.
The Thais are not disrespectful people but in the 'Land of the Free' (which is what Thailand translates to) there is an attitude that people will do just what they want.
I think that what June experienced is known as reverse culture shock. She doesn't drive in England but I have heard about Thais who live abroad for several years and get used to Western driving standards. When they return to Thailand - despite being Thai - they are unable to cope with how their fellow countrymen drive.
Thursday 9th November 2006
Do you really want to live the easy life?
I worked for a long time in a high-pressure IT environment surrounded by quite a few obsessive workaholics. Occasionally, when the pressure got too much, you would hear someone say that they'd had enough and that all they wanted was to retire to a beach somewhere or start doing a mundane but stress-free job.
I always knew though that because of the type of people they were, if they ever got what they wished for, the lack of activity and mental challenge would drive them crazy. As the saying goes, be careful what you wish for because you might actually get it.
I have had a very busy year and for a significant part of the year found it necessary to use a task list to keep track of everything. The tasks consisted of essential items (mainly related to my job and paperwork to allow me to continue living in Thailand) and non-essential items, but non-essential items that I had a very high degree of motivation to complete.
At one point, it seemed never-ending. Just as soon as I completed anything then something else would appear. I had plenty of things in mind to do after I'd finished these tasks but that time never seemed to be coming any time soon.
However, it arrived fairly recently. When November arrived and I turned the page of my desk calendar it was the first time all year that I found myself not looking at a series of things to do throughout the coming month.
I have nothing essential to do at the moment and I have time to do the other things but the problem is that I have temporarily lost my motivation. I hate being idle but I think this is my body's way of telling me that I need to take a bit of a break for a while.
It's only a temporary lapse and pretty soon a couple of things will happen. Firstly, some more essential tasks will appear and secondly, my self-motivation will return. I have interests in many fields and motivating myself isn't usually a problem.
I know many people though who I don't regard as being particularly good self-starters. They are not lazy, by any means, but with their jobs they are reaction-driven. As work comes in, they respond, work hard and do a good job.
However, in their own time, without that external stimulus to drive them, they seem to have problems getting anything done. They vegetate and still rely on external stimuli to avoid getting bored - watching TV, surfing the Internet, drinking, shopping and spending money.
Normally, these pursuits are only for short periods of time before they go back to work where there is discipline and direction in their lives once again. But what if they were living the 'easy life' in Thailand and didn't have any work to return to? What if they were completely in charge of managing their own time?
Vacations are great but vacation activities do get boring after a while and it's not possible to live life as if it is a permanent holiday. For a start, it gets expensive. Money is never an object for a short vacation but unless you are very rich, spending constantly as if you are on vacation is unsustainable.
Secondly, what do those activities comprise of? For the average single male tourist in Thailand it is drinking and prostitution which might be OK for two or three weeks but it is going to lead to problems over a period of time. Lots of men develop alcohol dependency problems in Thailand and not a few fall foul as a result of mixing with bar girls.
There are an infinite number of productive pursuits and activities you could spend time doing but you need to be motivated otherwise it just isn't going to happen. You need to know yourself and be honest with yourself.
Without work and/or constructive activities in Thailand, you will have a lot of time on your hands. It can get boring and in an effort to alleviate that boredom, certain activities can start to lead you on to a slippery path.
Immigration is a hot topic all around the world at the moment and there are lots of double standards. If required for specialist skills, or just for cheap labour, immigrants are welcomed but they are also a convenient scapegoat for everything that is wrong in a country.
This BBC report gives some details about Asian immigrants in Bangkok. When I was in Khaolak recently, every single manual or menial task was being done by Burmese workers. Is it exploitation or does it provide people who have no opportunity at all of earning any money to put food on the table for their families?
It's an interesting but controversial subject. In Thailand, of course, it is not only immigrants doing low-paid jobs in the country. Many Thais from poor parts of the country - especially from the northeast Isaan region - work in other parts of the country to meet demand from the construction, service and sex industries.
Wednesday 8th November 2006
I finally have my new Thai driving licence.
Living in Thailand sometimes gives me the impression of being transported unsuspectingly to a parallel universe. Everything looks completely the same on the outside but in one place life is easy and uncomplicated, and in the other everything is impossibly difficult.
At the Department of Transportation this morning I gave them the exact same documentation I gave them last week. They gave me a form to complete; I handed over the Bt505 fee and after waiting for about an hour I walked away with a new Thai driving licence valid for five years. It couldn't have been easier.
As I have documented extensively below, last week they requested another piece of information (which, as it turns out, was unnecessary) and, as a result, I was led on a massive wild goose chase which wasted many hours of my time, not to mention wasting the time of several other people.
So, what's the final analysis? Where did it all go wrong; are there any lessons to be learned; and could I avoid this type of thing in the future? I tried to get some answers from my Thai friends this morning but they didn't know and all they could say is that this kind of thing is completely normal in Thailand.
The Thais are incredibly patient but if you speak to them, you will find they get just as frustrated with the bureaucracy. The difference is that they understand the system and know that it can't be beaten. Making a fuss doesn't help so they just sit quietly and wait.
There were a few differences this morning. My two friends who work in local government accompanied me and dealt with everything. I just waited in the background and signed my name whenever it was necessary; not dealing with anything directly.
Because my friends had made some enquiries earlier this week, we were a lot more sure about the requirements. Even though the request last week conflicted with what was on the Thai Visa web site (and with what Iss's friend had said), how could I have told the girl who works there, "Sorry, you're wrong because that's not what it says on the Internet."
It would certainly appear that she was wrong though and that she didn't understand exactly what was required. Why, therefore, didn't she tell me she wasn't sure and that she would check? Was she afraid of annoying her boss? Was this greng jai for her superiors?
Or perhaps it was a loss of face issue? Maybe she thought she would lose face with me and with her superiors if she had to ask a question because she wasn't sure about something? If that was the case and it put her in a difficult position, maybe the best thing was just to get rid of me and the best way of doing that was to make up another requirement and send me on my way?
As you can tell, this is all speculation and I will never find out the real reason. But could something like this be avoided in future? The only way I think this kind of thing can be avoided is to be 100% certain that what you are being told is true. This is difficult though.
If you talk to people and search on-line about bureaucratic procedures in Thailand you are very likely to find different versions. So, which one is correct? And even if you do find something that is valid and consistent, how do you know that there hasn't been a recent change to the procedure? You don't. You have to rely on the person you are dealing knowing their job and being straight with you.
I'm going to close this subject now but I'm going to leave my previous blog entries. If I just wrote about what happened today, the whole thing would seem very easy but it would give no indication as to how much frustration this issue has caused.
The purpose of this site is to give a first-hand account of what living in Thailand is really like and unfortunately these frustrating situations are an occasional reality of life in Thailand. I feel relieved now but also a little angry still that so much time has been wasted.
Had I just been given the licence last week I would be in Bangkok now but I cancelled my plans this week to get this mess sorted out.
On the positive side, it has been truly heartwarming how many Thai friends and acquaintances have done their best to help. This is so typical of the Thais. They have a very different approach to life compared to farangs, especially those farangs living in Thailand.
Farangs seem to want to be independent little islands who manage everything themselves. The Thais are far more social and work together collectively. If someone has a problem, lots of people get together to help.
I admit that I too have the farang 'independent island' mentality most of the time but it makes very little sense, especially when living in Thailand. The other moral from this episode is that it certainly helps to have a few friends in high places in Thailand.
Without the help of my friends who are pretty near the top of the tree in local government I wouldn't have my licence now and probably wouldn't even be close to getting it.
Finally, I would like to apologise to ThaiVisa.com because the information on their web site for getting a Thai driving licence is just about correct, contrary to what I implied previously. The only thing I would dispute now is the fee which was actually Bt505 but on their site they say Bt105.
The other piece of good news today was that Thailand has finally got around to issuing Thaksin with a tax bill. If nothing else, this should at least delay his return to Thailand.
The Nation must be thoroughly enjoying Thaksin's current exile. Even at the height of his popularity when it was dangerous in Thailand to say anything against Thaksin, The Nation continued to expose the nasty truths about him. Brave people.
Today they published some photos of Thaksin in London along with the lyrics to Ralph McTell's 'Streets of London' which include the lines, "In his eyes you see no pride / And held loosely at his side / Yesterday's paper telling yesterday's news."
Indeed, this song seems to sum up Khun Thaksin's current state of affairs as he wanders around London with his hands in his pockets looking like a lost tourist with nothing to do. From the centre stage of Southeast Asian politics, he is now yesterday's news.
I will never understand Thaksin's greed. Long before he became Prime Minister, he and his wife had more money than they could ever spend in their life times. It was never enough though and regardless of how much money they continued to accumulate it was never going to be enough.
He could have done all the things he said he was going to do before he came to power (honestly) and then left the job with a legacy of being one of Thailand's finest politicians. Instead, his insatiable greed never let up and now, despite sitting on a vast fortune, he has nothing else.
He will return to Thailand one day but now is not a good time. For the time being, he cannot return to his birthplace and when he does he will probably face criminal proceedings for - among other things - corrupt conflict of interest practices, wealth concealment and tax evasion.
That's just the financial irregularities, which everyone talks about, but in light of Saddam having just been sentenced to death for crimes against humanity it would be very interesting to take a closer look at Thaksin's human rights record while he was in power.
When he does eventually return he will attempt to redeem himself by doing the only thing he can ever think of doing to get out of a difficult situation. He will just throw money at some poor people and tell them that all he ever wanted to do was to help Thailand's poor.
Many people probably imagine that vast wealth is the answer to everything but being insatiably greedy is a curse and Thaksin's greed has now come back to haunt him. Some more time spent doing Dhamma studies instead of developing his greedy nature at US business schools might have helped him avoid this final, unfortunate episode.
Tuesday 7th November 2006
It's not wise to write or speak when emotions are running high. Less that 24 hours ago I said I could quite easily turn my back on Thailand but today has been great. After working for four-and-a-half hours this week, my working week is over and I have five days off. Can't be bad.
My students were a joy to teach today. They are a great bunch of people anyway and today I heard some real progress which is always heartening as a teacher. A few weeks ago they were completely mystified about the differences between simple past and present perfect when talking about past events. The coin seems to have dropped though and suddenly the smiles are back.
I went for a massage after work and my current massage girl is a little angel. For a long time, I stopped going to the cheap places because many of the girls had a really bad attitude towards their work. I started going to a proper spa where the massages were great but the prices were high.
A couple of months ago I found this girl and she is as good as any of the girls in the expensive places but she works in one of the cheapest places in town. Two hours of lovely massage costs Bt200. I have to admit that I have been tipping her significantly more just so as not to lose her.
The weather is pleasantly cool at the moment; just about perfect, actually. It is always warm enough at any time of day just to wear the lightest of clothing but when it gets too hot it becomes oppressive.
After my massage I had chicken with sweet basil (gra-pow gai) on rice with a fried egg for Bt40. It was delicious. I know that I get frustrated with Thailand at times but there can't be many better places to live, especially as a single man.
With regard to my driving licence saga, my friends in high places have been on the case and now we have gone full circle.
They spoke directly to the Department of Transportation but the message this time was that I don't need to give proof of residence in Thailand. This news was quite exasperating. This matches what Iss's friend told her and what Thai Visa say on their web site but it was NOT what I was told last week.
That one request caused me all sorts of problems and wasted much time - not just my own time but that of many other people. But if I really don't need a document from immigration, why on earth did they tell me that I did?
The plan now is to go back tomorrow to try again. My gut feeling is that the same girl will tell me the same thing she told me last week. I will then dispute what she tells me and call my friend so that he can talk to her or her boss.
I shall find out tomorrow and post again later. Hopefully, I'll then be able to close this boring subject and get on to something different.
Monday 6th November 2006
Last week was a frustrating week but today that frustration turned to anger. There are times when I could quite easily turn my back on Thailand - even though I enjoy living here for the most part - and today has been one of them.
I have been a model expat since I arrived; behaving myself and doing everything by the book. I have spent what amounts to weeks dealing with bureaucracy and in the process have handed over a fair amount of money to the Thai government. I have lost count of how many forms I have filled out; how many times I have had documents photocopied and how many photos I have had printed to satisfy bureaucratic demands.
But despite all this, there is no limit as to how much the bureaucrats will continue to make me run around just wasting my time.
My current issue is simple. The Thai driving licence I acquired last year has expired so I need a new one. The government department that deals with driving licences want various documents; one of which is evidence that I reside in the country and that I'm not just a tourist. They told me to go to immigration to get this evidence. This is perfectly reasonable.
Immigration gave me such a document last year. They are also the people who issue me with my non-immigration visas and they are also the people I report to every 90 days to register as an alien in the country. If anyone can provide proof that I reside in Thailand, it is them.
However, they are flatly refusing to give me what I want. I visited their office last week and subsequently several Thais have spoken with them - on my behalf - but the answer is the same. They say that everything changed in September 2006; that they can't give me the document, and that I need to talk with the local government people.
This morning I went to see my friend who works for the local government and together we met the officials who deal with these matters. I wasn't sure what would happen but what began to unfold was not what I wanted.
Please excuse me if I have got some of my facts wrong because this subject is new to me and it is only based on my observations which may not be totally accurate.
From what I can work out, it appears that legal chanot-holding property owners in Thailand have a document known as a tabian baan which includes the names of everyone who resides at the property they own.
The path we started going down today was to get my name added to someone's tabian baan. However, a lot of paperwork is involved and I was told it would take a month to process. What I really didn't like though, is that this approach isn't above board.
It would involve giving me a legal address that is different to my actual address and that is clearly wrong. I don't want to get involved with anything that isn't above board - even if sanctioned by the local government - and it was making me uncomfortable.
While all this was going on I was thinking about the issue and it just seemed so obvious that immigration are the right people to do this.
Suddenly, the woman official pulled out the file of another farang living here; an Italian. There was lots of paperwork in his file and one piece of paper was a letter from immigration stating that he resides in Thailand.
This is the very document I need but which immigration say they can't give me because of the immigration changes that took place in September. However, the document they have given the Italian guy is dated 9th October 2006.
This was the point where I started to get really angry but I had to hold back my anger because the five people around me weren't responsible and were actually trying to help me. I told my friend that I was not happy about getting my legal address changed and that immigration are responsible for this mess.
Later in the day I met a colleague of hers who is very high up in the local government. He is a councillor and a lawyer. He has now taken photocopies of all my relevant documents and will talk to immigration to see if he can get them to produce the document I need.
This is driving me nuts and it really shouldn't be any big deal. Immigration are fully aware that I reside in the country because they gave me a visa to do so and they ask me to report to them every 90 days. Why can't they just write a letter to this effect?
It was suggested today that maybe someone wants some 'tea money' to smooth the transaction. I don't know but if they do want a bribe I wish they would just tell me so I can pay it and we can all get on with our lives.
My friend called immigration once again today. They were their usual unhelpful selves but made sure to remind me that if I change my address I have to tell them within 24 hours otherwise there is a Bt500 fine for every day I don't tell them.
It has never been mentioned before and there is nothing about this on the 'Alien Registration' form they give me to remind me of my next reporting date. Handy though, isn't it that they have yet another way to screw money out of an innocent farang?
If it ever gets to the point where I am presented with a huge fine for something they haven't told me about, I think I will decide to call it a day in Thailand. I am sick of this petty bureaucracy, time wasting and constant attitude that farangs are just sources for easy money.
I put a lot into my work and my name is well known around the university campus. Fairly often, students wanting help with something, such as getting their thesis proofread or preparing for a presentation, will contact me and I will do it for free. I try to bring something to this country and, of course, the money from my UK income goes straight into the Thai economy.
I lead a good life in Thailand so I'm not complaining but this bureaucratic crap is completely unnecessary. OK, change a few things to get rid of the dross but try to give the guys who have been playing by the rules a break, will ya?
I think that one of the problems is there are just too many bureaucrats. These government jobs are cushy little numbers and if you start to increase efficiency, the bureaucrats won't have anything to do. The fact that so much time is wasted seems to be completely irrelevant. Time is valued in Western cultures but it honestly doesn't seem important in Thailand if you waste several days of another person's time.
I don't have to work Wednesday so have five straight days off this week instead of the usual four. I was hoping to get to Bangkok to sort some stuff out but I want to get my driving licence sorted out first. No doubt, I will waste more of my free time chasing my tail around later this week.
Wow, I managed to write all that without using any strong expletives. It's a good job I have calmed down a little now and didn't write this earlier in the day.
I realise that this may be a boring subject but my objectives with this site are to give people who are considering making a move to Thailand some ideas about what expat life is really like here. I don't sit on a beach all day sipping cocktails, surrounded by beautiful women without a care in the world.
It's still a good life but, as with life anywhere, it isn't perfect. There are good and bad things about everywhere and in Thailand one of the major headaches with living here is the bureaucracy.
It's getting late and I'm still pissed off. The first problem with paperwork in Thailand is that you can never find out what you need beforehand. What I haven't mentioned so far is that Iss has a friend who works in the Department of Transportation and before I made the application she called him to find out what I needed.
He said nothing about proof of residency and this isn't mentioned on the ThaiVisa web site either. This is typical. When applying for anything in Thailand you can guarantee that on your first visit you will be told you need something else and turned away. It is so third world.
One of my students studied in the US for three months a year or two ago and she showed me the US visa application form. Everything required was detailed exactly including specific requirements for her photos.
It was exactly the same when I applied for a replacement UK passport at the British Embassy in Bangkok. Their web site gives exact details of what is required. I got everything together that they asked for and it was straightforward to make my application. There was none of this nonsense conjuring up further requirements and then sending me on a wild goose chase.
Mai pen rai ...... it will get sorted out eventually.
Sunday 5th November 2006
You have to laugh. I was just browsing through ThaiVisa.com and saw some information about getting a Thai driving licence renewed. According to ThaiVisa, nothing could be easier.
All you need is a couple of photocopies of your passport, a couple of photos, your old license and 105 Baht. Drop everything off in the morning and collect your new licence in the afternoon. Done. Finished. All you need to do then is get the rather flimsy piece of paper they give you laminated. Oh, if only .....
As I know from my own experience last week, it was nothing like this. This is not a criticism of ThaiVisa, who I know posted the information in good faith, and the procedure they describe may have worked in the past but this is Thailand.
I mentioned below that nothing is ever consistent. Every resource on the Internet provides different information and individuals experience different procedures attempting to do the same thing.
With this site, all I can do is explain things that happen to me personally. If you experience something different, it doesn't mean that what I am telling you is rubbish, it just highlights the nature of dealing with bureaucracy in Thailand. Nothing is ever the same.
Loi Gratong is early this year, falling, as it does, on the appropriate full-moon day rather than occurring on a fixed date. It's a nice, gentle festival which is in complete contrast to the aquatic anarchy experienced during Songkran.
Today is also a special day for us Brits. Last week I began attempting to explain Guy Fawkes night to a few of my students and, almost immediately after I'd opened my mouth, realised I was wasting my time.
"And what happened is that a group of Catholics tried to blow up our parliament 400 years ago but failed. We celebrate the failure of the plot each year by letting off fireworks, making bonfires and setting light to effigies of Guido Fawkes and Pope Paul V." It's one of those strange British quirks that only confirms to the rest of the world what a weird nation we are.
There are a variety of different events taking place this evening for Loy Gratong and I will find a body of water somewhere to float my environmentally-friendly gratong containing a lump of my hair, a piece of my fingernail and a small coin.
Saturday 4th November 2006
Just why are there so many lovely girls in this country? Is it something they put in the water? Each time I leave my apartment building I see scores of highly desirable girls in every location I visit. Today was no exception on a small shopping trip to the local supermarket and as I walked back I pondered this very question.
A lot of it is in the genes. Most farang girls are unattractive purely because they are overweight. If they were 40 or 50 pounds lighter (60 or 70 pounds in the US) they would look a lot better but there isn't much that is attractive about a fat lump waddling down the street with a lumbering gait.
In complete contrast, most Thai girls have gorgeous little bodies. You do get fat girls in Thailand but they are the exception rather than the rule. The majority - even if they aren't raving beauties - have bodies which could quite easily go on a catwalk.
One of the funnier moments I have experienced in Thailand was while taking a longtail boat from Ao Nang to Rai Leh beach in Krabi. On the boat were two enormous farang girls. They were both well over 250 pounds and probably pushing 300. I don't know if they were sisters or friends who had met at the local weight watchers club. They sat together causing the boat to list heavily to one side.
Just as we were about to set off, the boat driver started calling out, "You, you, you," (as Thais do). Everyone turned round to see what he wanted and saw that he was pointing to one of the fat girls. Once he had got her attention, he gestured to her that he wanted her on the other side of the boat. No questions were asked but the reason was obvious.
It would take a long time to find two Thai girls heavy enough that they ran the risk of capsizing a boat just by sitting together on the same side.
Facially, many aren't that stunning but Asian facial features are a lot more uniform and a lot less harsh then Western facial features. A lot of Thai girls may not be stunning but neither are they frighteningly ugly and they don't look as if they should only be allowed out at Halloween.
Their colouring is very easy on the eyes too. Nice silky black hair, light brown skin and dark eyes. On a trip to Phuket earlier this year it wasn't at all pleasant looking at anaemic, white-skinned women with stary blue eyes and - worst of all - ginger hair. The ginger gene (fortunately) is totally absent in Thailand.
Ironically, it is the Thai girls who try to increase their beauty by emulating farang girls, using skin bleaching products and hair dye, who achieve exactly the opposite result.
Thirdly, as the saying goes, beauty is only skin deep. Young, beautiful farang girls do exist but if you are an ordinary, 40-something year-old bloke, try smiling at one in London. The look you will get back will make you feel about two inches tall. Do you still think she is beautiful or do you now think she is an ugly, stuck-up bitch?
Smile at a beautiful girl in Thailand though and on most occasions you will get a lovely smile back. Now how do you feel about her beauty? After that lovely smile she will just seem even more beautiful than she did before. In a nutshell, Thai girls have much better attitudes.
I'm sorry, but in the beauty stakes between Thai and farang women, there is absolutely no contest. That hasn't always been the case though.
A book I read recently gave an account of Thailand over 100 years ago during the reign of King Rama V and made the comment that farang women in Siam at that time were considered a lot more beautiful than the local girls. I know, I know ... it sounds utterly ridiculous but apparently it was true once upon a time.
It was fashionable with Siamese women at that time to crop their hair and chew betel. Without their crowning glory and with sets of black, shiny teeth they didn't look too hot. How times change.
With all the fuss this week I almost forget that it was three years ago yesterday that I arrived in Thailand. I left the UK in September 2003 but spent time with my brother in Singapore, visited Australia and travelled through Malaysia before reaching Thailand.
I had no job, no place to stay and didn't know anyone. I checked into a hotel in the centre of town to begin my new life. Three years ago today I met Iss. The last thing I wanted to do straight away after arriving in Thailand was to find a regular girlfriend but some things in life can't be planned.
Unbelievably, we are still together even though the relationship has been through some very difficult times. Our relationship has now developed into a kind of supportive friendship which isn't ideal but I haven't got the heart to send her on her way and she won't listen to reason. I have tried several times in the past to separate, explaining that it would be best for both of us in the long run, but she just breaks down.
I have told her repeatedly ever since we got together that I can't guarantee being here forever and that one day I will just leave. She says she understands but I don't think she does. The poor girl loves me like no one has ever loved me. She's had a tough life, asks for nothing and has been very good to me but I will end up breaking her heart again as I've done many times already.
For a variety of different reasons, relationships with Thai girls are never easy and invoke every kind of emotion you can think of.
It's been a fantastic three years in the country. As I've written about on the first page of this site, I've been through lots of different stages and there have been times when I was ready to leave. It pays to persevere though and I'm glad I did.
Living in Thailand has brought happiness back into my life again, something that was totally absent during my last few years in England. I do not like British culture but I like Thai culture very much. Britain has been storing up major problems for many years and society is starting to get seriously out of control.
UK youths are 'among worst in Europe' and British adults 'fear youngsters'. These reports are not exaggerated. The drink culture is out of control and the culture of confrontation does not make for a pleasant place to live. This extends into the work place making many jobs unpleasant.
I am very comfortable around Thai people and with the cost of living so much lower, I can lead a good life without needing to be rich or work all the time to earn money. Balance is important in life but there was no balance in my life in England. There is in Thailand.
The most difficult thing is trying not to become attached to Thailand because of the laws of impermanence. My life has also improved by trying to live it according to some Buddhist philosophies. It's difficult however not getting attached to something that is so good.
Friday 3rd November 2006
It's been a much more relaxed day today. I picked up the notarised translation of my passport so I think I now have everything required to obtain this mysterious residency document. Once I have that I think I will then have all the documents to get my driving licence renewed. However, there are no guarantees.
The more I think about it, the more I believe that immigration weren't being straight with me yesterday or that they have misinterpreted some of the new rules.
Every 90 days I report to immigration to do my 'Alien Registration' so they are the people who have evidence that I reside in Thailand. If another government department wants proof of this it seems sensible to go back to immigration but as I found out yesterday, they weren't willing to provide this.
The problem is that there is no one to arbitrate. Each department says it's not their problem and just to go to someone else. It's a bit like having a computer problem where the hardware company blames it on the software and vice-versa.
No doubt I will get bounced around some more next week but that is normal for Thailand. Regarding the driving licence renewal, I don't yet know if I will have to do more physical tests again (reaction time and depth perception) and I also don't know how long a renewed licence will stay valid for. Ideally, five years or more because I don't want to go through all this again next year if I'm still in Thailand.
I had a good chat with Iss last night about the day's events. I dragged her around with me most of yesterday and I have dragged her around in the past trying to get various paperwork. She knows what it's like and I was wondering what she thinks about the current situation for farangs in Thailand.
Foreigners in Thailand who commit major crimes are actually very rare but when they do and the person is caught, the Thai media make a big deal about it so these high profile cases get a lot of exposure in the press. This is not a big problem though because it is so rare.
Iss sees a lot of scummy farangs who just aren't pleasant and these are a lot less rare, unfortunately. Some speak rudely to her which doesn't go down at all well and at least one has spoken very crudely in Thai. Something that I am becoming very aware of the longer I stay in Thailand is just how powerful language is here.
For instance, there are several different ways to address another person ranging from very polite to very crude. To an English speaker they mean nothing but to the Thais, it can almost be like dropping the 'c' word into a conversation if you deliberately use a crude form. Use the wrong pronoun and you might be very surprised by the reaction.
This is why you can swear and curse in English as much as you like at a Thai and they will just laugh because the words have no power. Teenage girls walk around in T-shirts with obscene English words written all over them and it means nothing. However, if you use bad words in Thai they have a lot of power and you can get into a lot of trouble.
Iss doesn't see a problem if the new regulations reduce the amount of scummy farangs in the country (and neither do I).
What I didn't realise though, until our conversation, is that there is quite a lot of underlying resentment quietly simmering away in the background. I have never regarded the Thais as particularly resentful of foreigners but it's there.
Iss - and I'm sure she isn't alone - sees many foreigners in Thailand (who are often fairly young) having a great time, living an easy life and who apparently have no money worries. She works long hours every day and although she does take time off, she has no scheduled days off.
I work six hours a week and earn in a month over three times what she earns in a month. My salary is guaranteed whereas hers isn't. Some days the shop has no customers and she doesn't earn a Baht. Whenever I don't work because of Thai holidays or department meetings (which is fairly often), I still get paid.
Farangs seem to get picked out for special treatment in Thailand and the Thais even notice this when compared to Asian foreigners. Iss knows Indian, Filipino and Burmese English teachers in Thailand who earn what is basically a local wage.
She knows that some of them are clever but if they work alongside a farang, the farang will earn more for doing the same job.
Iss's reaction seemed to be that these new regulations are levelling the playing field a little and whereas farangs have been able to get away with doing whatever they wanted to in Thailand before, now they can't.
I have had two dealings with Thai immigration since the new regulations came into force and on both occasions I sensed that the immigration officials were quite happy with the changes. I wouldn't describe Iss as being happy about the changes, but she seems to think that what is happening is a good thing because farangs in Thailand have had it too good for too long.
There's nothing xenophobic or anything and foreigners will continue to be treated very well by the Thais but why should they be given special preferences in the country over many Thai citizens? This is exactly what I hear all the time from the UK now about Polish, Romanian and Bulgarian immigrants who arrive in the country and are given a raft of benefits so it is no different.
I see nothing wrong with what is happening in Thailand but if the sense of nationalism goes too far it could start to become detrimental. No race is more xenophobic than the Chinese but in Singapore, which is 76% Chinese, and mainland China it is clearly recognised that Western people with Western skills are vital to the economy.
Nation, Religion, King are the cornerstones of Thai society and there have been bouts of xenophobic behaviour in the past against the Chinese. Thaksin played the nationalism card in his rise to power; the name of his party - Thais love Thais - not being an accident.
The poor level of English spoken in the country has already excluded Thailand from the lucrative call-centre and software services markets that other Asian countries have benefited from. If too many doors are shut to foreigners as a result of national pride, it could start to be a problem for the country.
Time will tell.
Thursday 2nd November 2006
Here is a nice summary of the new Thai immigration rules from Thai Visa. This post is a month old but because the changes didn't affect me I haven't been paying much attention to the details.
I was reminded by one of my e-mail correspondents not to wish my life away. For the first time since I was about 15, I have found myself wanting to be a little older recently in order to be eligible for a retirement visa. That would make life so much easier.
My job has now taken on a new level of importance, not for the salary, but because it is the key for me being allowed to live permanently in Thailand. However, it is on a rolling yearly contract and renewals are never guaranteed.
I know that I can find English teaching work if I really need to but the thought of going back to the daily slog of teaching in a school or language institute is not at all desirable. This is not something I need to do anything about for the next year but naturally it will be at the back of my mind.
.... fast-forward about ten hours and I have already started to eat my words about the new immigration rules not affecting me. Today has been one big headache dealing with Thai bureaucracy (which isn't unusual) but the new rules have made things even worse than usual.
I am only just starting to realise how far-reaching these new immigration regulations are and I would imagine that almost every foreigner living in Thailand will be affected to some extent. It's serious. Everything you want to do in Thailand now is tied together.
Living 'under the radar' will soon start to become almost impossible. To do anything in Thailand as a farang will require being in the system and for that to happen foreigners will need legitimate visas and, where appropriate, work permits.
Last Thursday I spent a big chunk of the day running around getting my visa and work permit extended. Today I have spent all day dealing with bureaucracy.
My first task was fairly easy - a trip to Songkhla to collect my work permit. After that I went to the Department of Transport building (also in Songkhla) to renew my Thai driving licence which expired a few days ago and this was where the problems began.
I had anticipated a few language problems so took Iss along. My Thai is OK for regular activities but I know from previous experience that dealing with government departments can be difficult. This was the first time I had attempted to renew my licence so I wasn't sure exactly what was required.
First they asked for my work permit, passport and photos. I had all of these. Next they asked for proof of residence from Thai immigration and this is what I didn't have. I had been waiting for them to ask for something that I didn't have. This meant going back to immigration in Hat Yai.
Before going to immigration I tried to anticipate what they would ask for and decided that some evidence from my apartment building to the effect I stay there would be required. However, it was beyond the ability of the receptionist to give me a simple piece of paper stating this.
She said I would have to wait from the manager but he wasn't available today. This attitude is very Thai and is to do with the strict hierarchical structure. Everything gets passed to the highest authority and underlings do not feel empowered to actually do anything themselves even if the request is a simple one.
Never mind. I just took a copy of my rental contract and some monthly receipts to prove I was living there.
The immigration guys were not pleasant today. It was a classic 'good cop, bad cop' scenario and the bad cop was extremely surly. The answer was an emphatic no; they couldn't give me proof of residence. They did last year when I got my first licence but they told me that everything had changed in September. And they had official memos to prove it.
'No' in Thailand doesn't always mean no, though. We didn't leave immediately but sat in the office for a while and the conversation continued. Some phone calls were made and I was then told that I needed to go to the local government offices (Tessabaan) to get what I needed.
This came as fairly good news because one of my friends works there. She is a local councillor, quite high up in the pecking order, and her uncle is the mayor of Hat Yai. She's a very useful person to know. I gave her a call and she got on the case.
She called me back later after speaking with the person who works in the relevant department and told me that I needed to bring in my work permit, my passport (with a Thai translation), details of my employment contract and five photos. No problem. However, she also mentioned that I needed proof of residence from immigration.
This didn't sound good. Immigration had told me I needed to go to the tessabaan and now the tessabaan was telling me to go to immigration. I felt like a tennis ball being hit from one side of the court to the other and back again. However, after some more phone calls this last request was dropped.
I then had to go in to work to get a copy of my employment contract. My next stop was to get my passport translated and I only knew of one place on the other side of town where I got my UK driving licence translated last year. However, I found out that they have stopped their translation service. Great.
They directed me to another place that offers a translation service. The fee for this was Bt300 but when I looked at my passport it seemed like a waste of time. The details are so basic that a translation hardly seems necessary but who am I to argue?
The only other twist is that when I go to the tessabaan I think that I have to go with my friend's mother (who is a house owner) and she will guarantee me. The document I am trying to get is called in Thai (I believe), a tabian baan and I am told that these aren't issued to people who live in rented accommodation.
This is all completely new to me which is why I may sound a little uncertain at the moment. Yet another day has been completely wasted due to Thai bureaucracy and my mission isn't complete yet. Even if I get this document there is no guarantee that the Department of Transport won't ask for something else that I don't have.
Unfortunately, this is how things work in Thailand and it is exactly the same for the locals but at least they speak the language. My Thai language deficiencies have been horribly exposed today dealing with this stuff. Some days I seem to understand and make myself understood all day but I have understood very little today.
You might ask the question, why bother with getting a Thai driving licence? The reason is that the Internet is full of conflicting information about what constitutes a valid licence in Thailand. Some sites say that a local licence is OK, others say it is OK with a Thai translation and others say that driving in Thailand requires an International Driving Permit (IDP).
What I don't want is to rent a car and be involved in an accident and then discover that my licence is invalid because that will probably invalidate the insurance as well. It just seems a safer option in the first place to get a Thai licence.
As I found out before (after I had rented a car for the day), small companies renting vehicles omit to give you a lot of information. They don't check your licence and don't tell you about insurance (or the lack of insurance, to be more accurate).
If nothing happens during the rental period it isn't a problem obviously but if you do have a mishap you could end up being liable for a huge amount of money.
If the car you are renting is involved in an accident with another car you could end up paying for the repair (or replacement) of both vehicles plus a daily compensation charge for the number of days the rental car is off the road. If people get injured you might also be responsible for medical fees. Read the link above if you don't believe me.
It's been a long day today. The weather has been horribly hot and I've travelled everywhere on buses, tuk-tuks, sawng-thaews and motorbikes. I've spent a fair bit of money and don't feel like I have achieved very much at all.
I need to collect the passport translation tomorrow and I will be busy two of three more days next week. I am not happy about spending so many of my days off doing this kind of thing but in a way I am fortunate. If I was working full-time it would be very difficult.
What is nice is how so many Thais are willing to help. This has always been the case ever since I arrived in Thailand. There have always been people around willing to spend time helping me. Iss actually got upset last year when she found out that I had allowed someone else to help me and not her.
The other piece of news today was one of the immigration officials telling me it isn't necessary to leave the country every 90 days on a non-B visa. No one had told me this before. Apparently, if I get my employer to vouch for me then immigration can give me a longer stay. I have asked one of the secretaries at work to look into it.
So far, I haven't actually come up against anything where I have been refused point blank and this is normally the case in Thailand. It was exactly the same when I applied for my first non-B visa and work permit.
They give you the runaround and present lots of hoops for you to jump through. Dealing with the bureaucracy requires an inordinate amount of patience and doing things the Thai way. You mustn't get upset or angry; when they ask you to jump you just ask how high and jump.
There is no consistency regarding requirements which means that what I have written here may not necessarily apply to someone else who is attempting to do exactly the same thing. Also, the rules change constantly.
In this type of situation it is a very good idea to get help from a Thai. Not only do they understand the language but they understand how the system works in Thailand. The bureaucracy is a headache but there are so many benefits to living in Thailand that it is a small price to pay and these changes should help to remove some undesirable farangs from the country.