Living In Thailand Blog
Thursday 8th October 2009
Now that I'm home (and very pleased to be home), I've been adding some photos to the posts below. Click on the thumbnails if you wish and a larger image should pop up, provided you have Javascript enabled. So far, I think my favourite shot is of the young Burmese girl in Mae Sot with the big, black eyes wearing a red top.
I will add some more photos later.
Wednesday 7th October 2009
In The Air - Chiang Mai to Bangkok and onwards to the deep south
When I flew into Bangkok's new airport from Chiang Rai a few years ago, I did so on the airport's opening day. It was deserted. That has changed now and whereas the old airport is now deserted, the new one has tourists everywhere.
It's a huge airport and despite a number of problems since it opened it seems to be running fairly smoothly now.
I must apologise for my general negativity recently. I have made my feelings known about tourist areas of Thailand and as soon as you get out of the tourist areas one part of Thailand looks very much like any other. There is a uniformity across the whole of Thailand that gets a little monotonous after a while.
Mae Sot was the highlight of my trip but even that wasn't really anything to do with Thailand. It was interesting because it gave me a glimpse into Burma; probably the closest you can get to a glimpse inside Burma without crossing the border.
My stay in Chiang Mai simply confirmed what I had already suspected; that it is completely overrun with farangs. Central Chiang Mai has now been added to my list of places to avoid in Thailand, along with Patong beach, Pattaya, Hua Hin, Samui, Krabi, Pai, etc. etc.
I much preferred Chiang Rai and although I would have no problems returning to somewhere in Chiang Mai province, I have no interest in returning to the main town again.
I've got through quite a lot of money on this trip and I don't really feel that it was worth it. Had I arrived from Europe, of course, it would have been different but as I already live in Thailand there is nothing about other Thai provincial towns of any great interest.
The girls working in Chiang Mai are fairly typical of Thai girls everywhere. It doesn't matter if they are trying to get you into a restaurant or bar, selling their bodies, selling T-shirts, or trying to get you to have a massage.
They are very good at turning on the charm in order to get business but none of it is sincere. Some have wanted to talk but I've tried getting into conversations with quite a few and it is clear that my attention really hasn't been wanted.
The reaction is that if you don't want to buy anything, then don't waste my time. They are only interested in one thing and once you have handed over your money you are no longer required.
I get the impression the girls regard the normal language barrier as being a good thing because the last thing they want to do is talk to farangs for the sake of talking. Farangs are there as a necessary evil because they bring money into the country.
I'm pleased to be heading home now and, for the moment, I have completely lost my desire to travel anywhere. When I do travel again it will probably be to one of the three troubled southernmost provinces to take a closer look. It certainly won't be anywhere on the tourist trail.
In the next few days I hope to be adding some photos here.
The Thai language has borrowed many words from other languages. Examples of why words are borrowed are for new inventions and for concepts that didn't originally exist. One word borrowed from English is 'free'.
In Thailand nothing comes for free - as you will know if you cross paths with one of the country's beautiful girls. Get involved with Thai girls and you never stop dipping in your pocket. If you get something, you pay for it. Simple as that.
Since leaving Mae Sot the only Wi-Fi network I could access was in Khun Soontaree's restaurant, but I wasn't there for long. In Chiang Mai, and also at the new airport in Bangkok, every Wi-Fi network I could access required some form of payment.
Hasn't Thailand heard about the connected world? Internet access is cheap in Thailand and there is no reason why more places can't provide it as a free service ... except that nothing comes for free in Thailand.
Thai vendors sitting around waiting for customers amuse themselves by talking to each other about foreigners. The comments tend to be observations only and I've never heard anything bad.
In Ranong a few years ago while walking through a market there was a typical farang male/Isaan girl couple and a vendor remarked that farangs like dark-skinned girls. This reinforces a stereotype that Thais have of farangs (farang chawp dum-dum).
Last night as I was wandering around Chiang Mai's night bazaar I heard a vendor remark to her friend 'sportsmen' (nuk-gee-laa). When I looked around there were two British guys aged around 50 completely clad in replica football strips and hi-tech training shoes.
I think the sight of two unfit men their age dressed up like David Beckham walking around Chiang Mai night bazaar looked as ridiculous to the Thai market vendors as it did to me. Why on earth do they do it?
Some farangs go for the pirate look with bandanas, earrings and tattoos; some go for the Michael Owen look; some go for the socks and sandals look; while others have taken years to cultivate the farang kee-nok look.
Farang hairstyles in Thailand are also worthy of mention. Farangs in Thailand seem to be believe it is necessary to make a statement with their hairstyle.
One option is to leave their hair to its own devices for about two years until dreadlocks form. Yesterday I saw a hippie girl riding a bike barefoot who had done this. Ponytails are favoured by middle-aged men who barely have enough hair left at the back of their heads to make a ponytail.
Balding guys seem to think that if they shave what little hair they have left then it will look as if they are completely bald by choice. What they don't seem to realise is that it is very obvious which parts of the head have been shaved and which parts are as grassless as an Astroturf football pitch.
What is it about farangs - especially backpackers - and rubber flip-flops? This type of footwear doesn't support the foot, and to keep them on you need to grip with your toes which can't be good for your feet.
Many poor Thai girls have very poor feet as a result of never having worn any other type of footwear. Their feet tend to be very wide with severely splayed toes.
If you are travelling and doing a lot of walking, wearing flip-flops doesn't seem a good idea but loads of farangs wear them.
Sometimes it seems that the entire output from southern Thailand's para-rubber industry goes into making flip-flops for farang backpackers.
Another very important reason for learning to read Thai is that you free yourself from the appalling transliteration that exists everywhere. Consonant sounds, vowel sounds, and vowel lengths are simply wrong in the case of most transliterations and if you pronounce place names as they are written in English you won't be understood.
Take Tak, for instance. A 'tack' is something you secure carpet with, not a place in Thailand. The initial consonant falls between an aspirated 't' and an unaspirated 'd'. English uses this sound a lot but there is no English consonant to represent it, There is in Thai, and when transliterated into English the best compromise is to write 'dt'.
The vowel sound is long and is best written 'aa' or 'ar'. The final consonant is an unreleased 'k' sound. Dtaak, therefore, is a more phonetically correct pronunciation.
Lampang is another example of bad transliteration. The vowel in the first syllable is 'um'. The second syllable starts with a consonant that also falls between two English letters - an aspirated 'p' and an unaspirated 'b'.
Again, English uses this consonant sound a lot but there is no letter to represent it. Thai (again) does have a consonant and it is best transliterated as 'bp'. The vowel in the second syllable is long.
If you pronounce this place lum-bpaang Thais will have a much better chance of understanding where you mean.
The list of examples goes on and on. There are very few places in Thailand where the standard transliterated name is phonetically accurate.
My policy here is to use standard transliterations when referring to places except when explaining pronunciations in which case the standard translation is useless.
Tuesday 6th October 2009
On The Road - Chiang Mai
Chiang Mai reminded me of my last trip to Patong beach this morning. Yesterday I saw a lot of places advertising breakfast so I went looking today at around 7:30am. Everywhere was closed.
In real Thailand the mornings are frenetic and many people have almost finished their work by 7:30am but in the tourist areas everyone is still asleep.
On my last trip to Patong I was propositioned by a ladyboy during an early morning walk, and exactly the same thing happened today. I think he had just finished the night shift and was looking for one more piece of business.
He seemed harmless enough and I feel sorry for them but I really don't welcome the attention of ladyboys. I just said no and walked on. When it happened in Patong I told him I liked girls to which he replied, "It's the same." I don't think so.
I got chatting to a freshly arrived backpacker this morning. He was armed with a fake copy of Lonely Planet which he had bought in Cambodia. The cover and some of the glossy photos looked quite authentic but everything else was poorly photocopied.
He had only just arrived but had already been ripped off by an Indian tailor. His story was similar to one of my own from my first ever trip to Bangkok.
He was approached by someone in a temple who showed him some of the merit-making rituals. This guy then said it was a special Buddhist holiday (actually true - Awk Punsaa) but then started telling lies about there not being tax to pay on such holidays.
He was taken to an Indian tailor shop where he ordered £1,000 of suits and other clothes before he realised he had probably been ripped off.
I find it a little incredulous that years after these scams started, tourists are still falling for them. His example was a classic text book scam. Simply ignore Thais who approach you because good Thais would never approach a stranger.
Nothing really surprises me much about Thailand any more but because I live a fairly normal (some may say boring) life in Thailand I find myself forgetting what happens when farang men meet poor Thai girls.
Yesterday's massage girl was a typical Thai girl. She's 22, the youngest of 12 children from a poor village in Isaan, bother parents have passed away, she has a minimal education, and she's working in a cheap massage shop in a tourist area.
There is nothing wrong with any of this and she's a sweet girl - as many of them are. I like talking with these girls to find out about their lives and even though nothing comes as a surprise, some things make me grin.
She was telling me about a 72 year-old farang who comes to visit Thailand for one month twice a year. When he's in Thailand she stops working and acts as his companion. She calls him Papa but Grandpapa might be more appropriate.
She showed me a photo of him on her mobile phone and he looked a bit like Private Godfrey from Dad's Army. No sex is involved. The hand action she gave indicated he was past this stage of his life even with the help of Viagra.
For her companionship he gives her Bt50,000 on each visit. She gets flown to Bangkok, Hua Hin and the islands in the south where he pays for everything and gives her a generous sum of money. Can't be bad.
On one of their trips to Hua Hin she met a 33 year-old Thai guy working in a hotel who she calls her boyfriend. She also told me that next month her 53 year-old Canadian boyfriend is due to visit Thailand.
She is the type of girl that most Thai men have no interest in at all so farang men must seem like a gift from heaven to poor, uneducated Thai girls. Good luck to her.
Thai girls have very strange ideas about money depending on whose money it is. First, I'll give you some ideas about what Thais earn.
I've spoken to many poor girls who have worked in the rice fields, and whose families work in the rice fields. For this back-breaking work they might earn Bt150 per day.
Many massage parlour girls only earn about Bt80 for two hours work. Since the economy ran into problems, some girls have days where they don't get any customers and therefore don't earn any money.
Junior Thai teachers at the school where I work earn just over Bt8,000 a month and they work hard. Even the senior teachers, after many years of service, don't earn much more.
Many of the staff at the hospital where I worked (which is government work) earn only around Bt10,000. Waitresses, maids, cleaners and other unskilled workers might earn Bt4,000 to Bt6,000 a month.
The massage girl I mentioned above is provided with two paid-for holidays a year and given Bt100,000. I told her this was a lot of money to which she replied it wasn't. Really?
When I loaned my old girlfriend Bt20,000 recently I joked about never seeing her again. She remarked that Bt20,000 is nothing.
In the past I've had a number of regular massage girls who I tip quite well but there always comes a time when they tell me I don't give them much money.
Thais are very careful with their own money and count every Baht. If you buy something for Bt20,001 and hand over Bt20,000, you won't hear, "Don't worry about one Baht." They will wait with their hands out until you have paid the exact amount.
But when they are talking about money that isn't theirs, no matter what the amount, it is always nothing.
The weather in Chiang Mai at this time of year is most agreeable. I've been sleeping with the window open and no air-conditioning. Fortunately, the hotel I'm staying at has mosquito screens so you can do this.
Many hotels I've stayed at in Thailand have no mosquito screens. You have the option of opening windows and being eaten alive or closing them and having to use the air-conditioner. Thais, if they can afford it, sleep with their air-conditioners on.
In my apartment building I spotted the room bill for a Thai resident whose electricity bill for the month was over Bt4,000. The portion of my bill for electricity is around Bt100 a month. I was amazed that it was possible to use Bt4,000 worth of electricity a month but I guess you can by running the A/C constantly.
This region of Thailand gets very hot in the hot season but at least there are times of the year when it is pleasant. The south is just too hot all year round. The hot season in the south isn't as bad as elsewhere but there is never any respite from the heat.
In the south it is either hot and dry or hot and wet. The only time it cools down is when there is torrential rain but then you can't go anywhere. As soon as the rain stops and the sun reappears, it is back to being too hot again.
Chiang Mai in the morning is a lot more pleasant than it is at night. The streets aren't cluttered with tourists and tacky stalls, and Thais are going about their normal business. It really is a very pleasant city, apart from the mass tourism.
Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do about the tourism. Since getting here I've walked around a lot and every single business in the central area (which is quite large) is aimed at tourists. In this respect, it is no different to any other mainstream Thai tourist resort.
There are touts everywhere. It is impossible to walk 10 yards without being asked if you want a taxi, massage, or suit. This is bearable at first but it gets old very quickly.
The tuk-tuk drivers are pushy. I ignore them and walk straight on. They then come chasing after you as if you didn't hear them the first time. "Tuk-tuk," they keep saying. Yes, I know what it is but I am trying to ignore you.
You can't blame them; they are only trying to get business. This is the problem though when an entire town puts all its eggs into one basket. Chiang Mai is geared up for a lot more tourists than are present at the moment and consequently there isn't enough business for everyone.
When everyone depends on tourism it only takes one natural disaster (the Asian tsunami) or a global financial crisis and everyone suffers because they have nothing else to fall back on.
Central Chiang Mai seems to be doing OK but it really has sold its soul to the tourism devil. The only places I've noticed that are devoid of tourists are Chiang Mai's beautiful Buddhist temples.
Despite the fact it isn't quite farang tourist high season yet, and despite the fact we are only just coming out of worst economic recession to hit the world for many years, there are still a lot of foreigners in Thailand. However, it isn't quite like it was before.
Thai shop and restaurant workers in Chiang Mai have been telling me the foreign tourists are still coming but they are watching their money carefully and spending a lot less. One girl working at a seafood restaurant in the night bazaar told that me that whereas a few years ago they might spend over Bt1,000 each on food and drinks, now it's only Bt300 to Bt400.
The sin I dislike most is greed and this is something I come across often in Thailand. It is most prevalent where there are lots of tourists.
This morning I grabbed a cup of coffee from Starbucks. A medium sized cup of coffee was Bt90. I know places in Thailand where I can buy four rice-based meals for this amount but never mind; I'm on holiday.
I tried to check my e-mail using Starbucks' Wi-Fi connection. Many coffee shops I use at home have free Wi-Fi and by offering this it is the only way they can stay in business.
A screen appeared asking for a password. I went to the counter to get the password, thinking they reserved this for customers only. The guy told me it was Bt150 an hour.
There are Internet shops in Thailand that charge Bt10 an hour and you can get a broadband connection for around Bt500 a month.
After charging exorbitant prices for their coffee you'd think the least Starbucks could do is offer free access to customers. But no.
This kind of thing is only allowed to continue because tourists pay up. In areas of Thailand where there aren't loads of tourists this business model wouldn't last five minutes.
Starbucks is bad news and it was a big mistake going there; a mistake I won't make again. A bit later in the day I found a great place just along the road called The Old Chiangmai Cafe. It's in a beautifully restored old building with a sweet Chiang Mai girl working there.
It has bags of atmosphere and better tasting coffee than Starbucks at exactly half the price. I was reading that the Starbucks chain is in serious trouble around the world, especially in the States.
It's the classic business story of a business having a good idea and quickly becoming the market leader, but then allowing other companies to get ahead due to arrogance, greed and complacency.
My initial impressions of Chiang Mai on this trip have been clouded by staying in the middle of the tourist district around the Night Bazaar. That was self-inflicted but when you don't know somewhere it is convenient to start off in the centre.
This is what always happens and then I start to explore outside areas. That is what happened today. In Thailand the tourist areas aren't that large and in most places you only need to walk 10 or 15 minutes away from them to find real Thailand.
You quickly find yourself in authentic areas with no tourists. There are no MacDonalds so where are they going to eat?
It is inaccurate and unfair to base one's impressions of an entire city on the tourist area. Away from the central tourist area Chiang Mai seems to be a very pleasant city . Chiang Mai suits a lot of people but the sheer volume of foreigners, and the amount of Westernisation, makes it a non-starter for me.
Here are a few miscellaneous observations about Chiang Mai compared to Hat Yai. Firstly, during my entire stay I didn't see a single rat. I know foreigners in Hat Yai who refer to the town as Rat Yai ... and for good reason. The town has a major rat problem and it is impossible to go anywhere without seeing large rodents scurrying around.
Secondly, and this confirms what Thais have told me, the driving is a lot more civil in Chiang Mai. Hat Yai has to be home to the most aggressive drivers in Thailand.
Thirdly, Thais in Chiang Mai seem to be under the impression that the south is a war zone. No doubt, this is a result of how the media report the news. As I've tried to explain, in provinces like Songkhla there are a few occasional problems but living there is quite normal.
What is it about central Chiang Mai and the other tourist areas of Thailand that so grates with me? They're harmless aren't they, and they provide a living for locals?
Once upon a time - not very long ago at all - this part of the world was an exotic gem. Now, with thousands of foreigners wandering around, and the amount of Westernisation that has taken place, I feel that it has been ruined. It makes me very sad.
In spiritual terms what goes on is everything that Buddhism warns against. Tourists come to grasp at every sensual pleasure they can, whether it be pleasure for the eyes, nose, mouth, mind or skin; and people who go back to live in tourists area do so because of attachment to those feelings.
Areas of Thailand with lots of tourist attract the worst kind of Thais and you encounter lots of bad behaviour and greed.
Just down the road in Mae Sot there are thousands of Burmese refugees living in abject poverty. In Thailand's tourist areas are thousands of expats, many of whom are only interested in a life of selfish drunken hedonism. Many foreigners end up in Thailand for all the wrong reasons, and not because they have any genuine interest in the country at all.
What, on the surface, seems like harmless human activity in these tourist areas is something that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I'm very much an exception though.
I wasn't sure how long this trip would last or where I would end up. However, I've had enough already and I've booked my flights home.
The Thailand I enjoy can be found anywhere in Thailand so I might as well be at home. I feel guilty sometimes about not travelling in Thailand while living here so force myself to explore other regions.
Some parts of the country are interesting but whenever I find myself on the mainstream tourist trail I don't enjoy it at all. At the rate Thailand is being developed there will be very few places left to visit soon that don't have masses of tourists.
Monday 5th October 2009
On The Road - Chiang Mai
I've been using this trip to assess (and hopefully improve) my language skills. By far the easiest skill is reading. Reading passages of Thai text is tough but single words and short phrases - as found on signs and menus - are very easy.
Anyone who has lived in Thailand for six months or more should be able to read Thai to a basic level. There really are no excuses. On this trip I think I have been able to read everything I've seen and my reading speed is improving gradually.
With our native languages, we don't read as such; we recognise the shape of words. I can do this with a few familiar Thai words but I read letter by letter most of the time and this is slow. Reading like this, for example, doesn't allow me to keep up with movie subtitles.
I still have problems with some unfamiliar words, knowing whether there are implied (unwritten) vowels or not; and whether the final consonant of one syllable is used as the initial consonant of the following consonant. Another problem is that some final short vowels aren't pronounced, and whereas there is a special symbol to indicate this in some words, there isn't in others.
Listening is quite tough. I was talking to an elderly lady recently and she used a word for 'night' that I'd never heard before. For almost every noun and verb there are multiple Thai words. The differences may be regional or they may be to do with the level of politeness being used.
With listening, I find myself not being able to follow the entire sentence most of the time, but I pick out words and hope I get enough information to understand the meaning. In Thai not only do the same things have multiple words, but similar sounding words mean entirely different things.
Writing is very tough. I send a lot of text messages in Thai but I do so with the aid of a Thai dictionary. There are lots of consonants with the same sound. For example, there are four consonants and one consonant cluster that make an S sound.
You know the word begins with S but which consonant is used? Thai words only have a limited number of final consonant sounds but several different final consonants make the same sound. Which one do you use?
The next problem is tone marks. There are four but two are used often and two very rarely. Next is vowel sounds. With lots of Thai words these vowel sounds are implied and unwritten - but not all.
If the word originated from another language then it can have a consonant (or a consonant and a vowel) at the end but with a special symbol to say ignore what is below. This makes no difference to the pronunciation but it does to the spelling.
Two silent characters are written before certain initial consonants purely for tone purposes. Does the word you want to spell use one of these?
All this stuff is difficult to learn. Thai kids learn by rote, and although rote learning gets a generally bad press it is very good for this type of thing where the spelling of words just needs to be committed to memory.
Writing is difficult but fortunately it isn't required very often.
With speaking I have run across several problems that are out of my control. Most Thais have no confidence when talking with foreigners, whether it be in Thai or English.
I called Mo Chit bus station before my trip to get some bus times. The conversation was going well up until the point I said something she couldn't understand. The line went quite and then a Thai man started speaking.
She had decided she wasn't going to continue the conversation and just handed the phone to a colleague. When talking in person I notice that some Thais just switch off. I can see that as I speak they aren't even listening. It is obvious then that they won't understand.
A big problem is that Thais never expect foreigners to speak Thai - despite millions of tourists every year. There is a very common scenario that I have played a part in many times.
I speak Thai and initially there is a bewildered look. They don't understand. At some point they realise what is happening and suddenly tune in. Two minutes after looking completely baffled they are telling me how good my Thai is.
There's one more problem. In the tourist areas there are quite a few Thais who rate their own English very highly, even though it isn't very good. They don't like foreigners speaking Thai and if you speak Thai they make out they can't understand so that they can start speaking their bad English. At times like this I choose not to understand their English.
I was quite excited when I first got to Chiang Mai but it didn't take long for the smile to disappear from my face.
On the way out of the hotel I grabbed a business card so I could find my way back. The receptionist then told me that if I get lost the nearest best known landmark is MacDonalds. Welcome to exotic Southeast Asia.
MacDonalds was packed last night and there are branches of Starbucks and every other fast-food chain you can think of. The night bazaar is just Patong without the sea. I stopped at one stall because I couldn't believe how tacky the T-shirt slogans were.
The guy asked what I wanted to buy. Nothing, I told him, I'm just looking. He then started questioning why I didn't want to buy. This didn't go down well with me.
I've experienced this type of thing in tourist areas of Thailand before. Thais go to these places to earn money from tourists and they expect tourists to buy their goods or services. When the tourists don't want to buy they can get quite aggressive. This is very un-Thai; an example of how Thai behaviour has been corrupted by tourism.
By the time a second grinning Indian appears from inside a tailor shop trying to shake my hand in order to sell me a suit I've had enough.
I walked through an area of bars and bargirls with the usual assortment of farangs dressed as pirates. Horrible. This isn't the Chiang Mai I remember but this is exactly what I suspected it would be like.
Before a place has any tourist infrastructure it can be quite difficult for visitors. There's a short period where places are still unspoilt but there is enough of a tourist infrastructure to make life enjoyable and convenient.
I've experienced this in Bangkok, Samui and Pattaya (1987), Phuket (1992) and elsewhere. What happens after that though is that tourism completely takes over. When this happens there isn't anything left of the original location; everything is there purely for tourists and the whole experience becomes very artificial.
I remember going to the Epcot centre in Florida many years ago and visiting one section about world culture or something. There were different areas for different countries where you could buy food and drink from those countries.
This kind of artificial tourism is now happening everywhere. The original culture disappears only to be replaced with an artificial reproduction for the tourists.
Walking around Chiang Mai last night wasn't really any different to walking around Patong, apart from there not being any sea.
What you need to bear in mind though is that I am very much an exception. The tourists in the places I dislike obvious like these places very much. It's good that we all think differently.
I haven't helped matters by staying right in the centre of the tourist area. I did that because I will only be in Chiang Mai a few days and wanted to get a feel for the place. If I lived in Chiang Mai it would be away from the tourists.
Sunday 4th October 2009
On The Road - Mae Sot to Chiang Mai
I imagined that from Mae Sot I would need to get a minivan back to Tak in order to get a bus to Chiang Mai. However, last night's massage girl (a Chiang Mai lass) informed me there are two buses that go directly from Mae Sot bus station at 6am and 8am. The first one is too early for me and I am writing this while sitting on the 8am bus waiting to leave.
Mae Sot met, and exceeded, all my expectations. In some ways it was similar to my trip to Sangkhlaburi a few years ago but Sangkhlaburi is a lot quieter. This was a quick visit because I didn't intend this trip to be very long but I recommend Mae Sot if you want to see some interesting parts of Thailand.
Chiang Mai, on first impressions, looks very welcoming. This area is often referred to as Lanna (back to my favourite Thai singer again), where laan is Thai for million and naa is Thai for rice field - Land of a Thousand Rice Fields.
As you travel in the north of Thailand this is quite noticeable. When the sun hits freshly grown rice plants at the right time of day, that particular shade of green is probably the most beautiful colour I have ever seen.
As I knew there would be, there are farangs everywhere in Chiang Mai. I read somewhere that there are 10,000 resident farangs in the city and, of course, all the tourists.
Chiang Mai is a good size though. It's big but not as overwhelming as Bangkok, and it doesn't have all the high rise buildings and concrete that Bangkok has. It still has a provincial feel to it, but it is big enough to find places to escape the tourists.
I am writing this while sitting in Lanna's mum's restaurant. Khun Soontaree is a cat-lover apparently and there are a number of magnificent felines wandering around that I have made friends with.
More later.
Saturday 3rd October 2009
On The Road - Mae Sot and the Burmese border
I eat mainly Thai food in Thailand but I need a Western style breakfast in the morning. At home I have a toaster. While on the road it isn't normally a problem finding Western breakfasts apart from in areas that never see foreigners. One example is Thale Noi in Phattalung where you simply can't get Western food.
I was pleased to find a wonderful bakery in Mae Sot. It is beautifully decorated and a lot of thought has gone into absolutely everything. It's a work of art. In addition, the staff are very friendly, the food is good, and it's not expensive.
The owner trained in the world-famous Oriental hotel in Bangkok and that speaks volumes. My day in Mae Sot begins at the Sweet Harmony bakery.
Also having breakfast is a Thai girl from Phuket. She speaks good English (as a result of having studied abroad) and has lived in Mae Sot for four years. She works in the field of renewable energy.
She tells me that on the border the villages have no electricity supply. She says there are a lot of foreign volunteers in this area working for NGOs. I was asked the other day if I worked for an NGO and now I know why.
She wants to know what I'm doing in Mae Sot. She just told me she comes from Phuket but I feel obliged to give her my thoughts about Phuket, Pattaya, Samui and the other farang tourist resorts. To me these places are boring with a capital B.
The last thing I want to see in Thailand is rows of tourists sunning themselves on the beach like lizards in the morning sun; drunken tourists; tacky T-shirt and souvenir shops; Indian tailors calling themselves Armani; tattooed skinhead thugs wearing English football shirts; Isaan prostitutes; sex tourists; sexpats; greedy, unfriendly and jaded Thais; tacky souvenir shops; Western style shopping malls; and rip-off prices.
The great thing about Thailand is that this stuff is isolated to a few very well-known places and by simply avoiding these places it is possible to find real Thailand.
It's Saturday, a full moon, and the end of the Buddhist Lent rains retreat. Mae Sot is therefore pretty quiet. I decide to visit the border area near the Thai/Burma friendship bridge but I still have no plans to go across the border.
At the border there are Burmese everywhere and people are constantly crossing the river in boats and on large tyre inner tubes. There are armed Thai soldiers around but they obviously don't care about all the people coming and going. Blind eyes are being turned in all directions.
There are Burmese selling cigarettes, Viagra and other things. I have never used Viagra, have never seen the need for it, and even if I did I doubt I would buy it from a Burmese refugee on the Thai/Burmese border.
There is a path running along the Thai side of the river that forms the border. I ask a soldier if I can walk along it. He says I can but that it is dangerous.
It is then that I am approached by a Burmese guy who says he is a guide and can help me. At times like this you never know if you can trust someone or not. He could lead me anywhere.
At such times I rely on my gut instincts. He says he will keep me safe. We shake hands and I look him in the eye. He seems OK. His name is Mr Myo and last week, he tells me, he guided Tom Webster, a BBC journalist. He has also taken journalists to brothels in Mae Sot to interview the Burmese prostitutes.
It proves to be a good tour. This area is awash with illegal activity. There are large trucks everywhere, the goods from which are unloaded and sent across the river in boats. There are used cars and bicycles from Japan and all sorts of food and drink.
None of this is legal but the blind eyes are very much in evidence. The officials whose job it is to prevent cross-border trade just take payments to supplement their income.
Mr Myo tells me there are several illegal clothes factories staffed by Burmese. They work from 8am to 5pm, get an hour's break to eat, and then continue working from 6pm to 9pm. They work every day for about Bt3,500 a month.
The problem in Thailand is that money comes first and everything else comes a distant second. The people directly involved in the verious cross-border illegal trades do well and there are lots of people on the take who are happy to look the other way.
In a society where morality plays such an important part this seems contradictory but, as I have said many times before, Thailand is as a country of extreme contrasts and contradictions.
The Burmese are a very tight-knit community. Mr Myo talks to everyone and there are big smiles all round. The girls are very shy but he normally manages to coax them into having their photographs taken.
He is not always a welcome guest though. One illegal factory he points out is run by a big mafia boss and everything here (like everything else in this area) is illegal. Farangs snooping around with cameras are not really welcome, and neither are their guides. At first Mr Myo assumes I am a journalist but I explain to him I am here purely for my own interest.
He tells me that sometimes the factory owners shout at him. There are a few places he tells me where we cannot go. He lives in Thailand but visits his family every three months. He was in trouble with the Burmese authorities and has been blacklisted. He therefore can't work.
He spent some time in a Burmese prison and was beaten. One side of his jaw is visibly larger than the other; a result of the beatings. He refers to Aung San Suu Kyi as mother and - like the Burmese man I was chatting to yesterday in Mae Sot - says that he has hope for Burma.
I mention the American idiot who swam to Aung San Suu Kyi's house earlier this year. Burmese people hate this man and won't even mention his name. They theorise that this stunt was a set-up and that he was paid by the junta to do what he did, just so they had a reason to detain Aung San Suu Kyi longer with elections coming up next year.
The reason for the state of Burmese teeth is that betel chewing is still very much part of the culture. Mr Myo says that that if you visit someone's house in Burma you will be offered betel. He chews some as we walk around and there are betel juice stains on the floor everywhere. You still see this with older people in Thailand but it is dying out.
He warns me about the area near the river where the cigarette and Viagra sellers ply their trade. There is an island in the river between Thailand and Burma that apparently is no-man's land. It is home to some Burmese and there is a ramshackle collection of huts.
Signs warning against pickpockets are posted in this area. If they snatch a bag and run over to the island then they are untouchable.
I take lots of photos of kids and Mr Myo remarks that I like kids. Like isn't a very good verb. I feel enormous pity and compassion for them. Adults get their heads filled with likes, dislikes and prejudices. The minds of children are a lot purer though, and they have an innocence that isn't found in adults.
Seeing kids living as they do, in abject poverty without education and without any opportunities in life, lies heavy on my heart. It's just not right. If kids get opportunities in life but screw their lives up, that is up to them. But for kids never to get any kind of opportunity violates basic human rights.
Also, by not giving kids opportunities we will never realise their potential. I'm sure many of these children have wonderful talents that will never see the light of day.
NGOs do a lot in this area and have set up clinics and schools. One young lad showed us the pass he has to allow him to attend an NGO school in Thailand.
Mr Myo said that very few foreigners go where I went today. It seems that journalists have an interest but that's about it. Maybe if more people could see what is going on then it might hasten regime change in Burma. The current situation cannot continue.
Mr Myo asked if I could spread the word about his services and I am very pleased to do that. His e-mail address is myo2003@gmail.com and mobile phone number in Thailand is +66 (0)84 687 2886.
He is an honest, trustworthy guy and can give foreigners an insight into an area of Thailand that very few foreigners see. Importantly, he will keep you safe while doing so. He told me his rate was Bt100 per hour but at the end of my tour he just left it to me.
For a little over two hours I gave him Bt300. He seemed satisfied and I was satisfied with his tour so we both departed feeling pleased.
I took quite a few photos today but I'm shooting in RAW and I can't process these files on my little netbook. I hope to add some photos soon.
I think I will head to Chiang Mai tomorrow for a few days and then head home. It's been nine or ten years since I was in Chiang Mai so I guess a trip back is long overdue. I also want to visit my favourite Thai singer's mother's restaurant.
What a great life being a photojournalist. They get to do things that I do in my spare time for fun, and they get paid for it. All the hard work of translating and knowing where to go is done by a local guide, such as Mr Myo. The journalist just takes a few photos, adds some commentary, and takes all the credit.
This type of photography falls into the area of street photography and it's quite different to other forms of photography. Here are some observations.
Having to change lenses is bad news. What I could really do with is a 17-200mm high quality fixed aperture zoom but I don't have one.
As you walk around and see things you need to react immediately otherwise the opportunity disappears and it won't come back. The photo opportunities are in very different lighting situations. Some subjects are static and some are moving.
What is really important is knowing your camera well and how to change basic settings quickly. Things like ISO, basic exposure, exposure priority and flash usage, AF settings.
This gets better with practise. I still miss a lot of shots because of wrong camera settings but I am getting better.
Photos to follow soon.
The group of Germans that showed up in Kamphaeng Phet brought with them enormous amounts of luggage. I applaud them for getting off the tourist trail but their style of travelling is still very much organised.
The great thing about travelling while living in Thailand is being able to travel light. My clothes and personal effects go into a small holdall. If I run out of clean clothes there are laundry services everywhere in Thailand so it isn't necessary to bring fresh clothes for each day.
I know people who pack every kind of toiletry when they travel. This is all available in Thailand unless you need something really special. Thailand has electricity too so you can leave your generator at home.
Travelling light is so much easier and it allows you to make decisions quickly. On a few occasions I've just managed to catch buses but if I'd been carrying loads of luggage that wouldn't have happened.
I carry two bags and the other bag isn't so clever. The small netbook computer I bought last year has proven invaluable when travelling. I'm typing this in my hotel room in Mae Sot. However, my camera gear has started to get a little out of hand.
I carry one body, a 17-40mm lens, and a 70-200mm lens. That's about the bare minimum but really it is too heavy. I think I will buy the new Canon S90 but although it has been announced, I haven't seen one for sale yet.
It looks to be a serious compact camera and being able to shoot RAW, I will be able to keep the same workflow. If I was a really serious photographer I would take all my lenses, flashes, reflectors and a tripod but then it just becomes a photography assignment instead of an enjoyable trip.
The only other things I have brought are Thai-English and English-Thai dictionaries and a map. I use the map to plan a rough route.
Back in the UK I spent a lot of time and money reading travel guides. What I should have been doing was learning Thai. Every minute you waste with Lonely Plant could be used for something far more useful.
I've used this trip to test (and improve) my Thai language ability. You don't need to be able to speak or read Thai to travel in Thailand - millions don't. However, it makes a huge difference.
In Bangkok everything is in Thai and English but as you get further away there is less English. Some buses have their destinations in Thai only. If you can't read you have to ask a Thai every time; and sometimes they won't be able to understand you.
A lot of people have just spoken to me in Thai. It's no problem but it is if you can't speak Thai. You can point, mime and use your fingers but it is so much easier if you can speak a little. But it goes a lot further than this.
Thais love to laugh and joke. What I've noticed though is that when they speak to a foreigner they get very serious. Basically, foreigners don't see Thais at their best. If you know some Thai and know the kind of things they joke about it relaxes them and the experience of being in Thailand gets a lot better.
I go for lots of massages and I always talk to the girls. I know this relaxes them and I'm sure I get much better service. There are just so many reasons.
When Thais try to be dishonest with me I like to listen to what they are saying to their friends. I never use travel guides but ask locals for recommendations. You need to be able to speak to do this. When they tell me about somewhere and the sign is written in Thai you need to be able to read.
On the way to Mae Sot is an ostrich farm. There is just a big sign outside with the Thai word for ostrich. I wonder how many foreigners pass this without even knowing?
The best way to turn Thailand from a good place into a great place is to have some ability in the language. Thai is a very difficult language at an advanced level but the basics are easy and reading is easier than speaking.
If people would throw away their guide books and spend time instead learning some Thai it would make for a much better vacation.
Around Mae Sot there are a lot of older foreign men who look as if they have led professional lives before retiring. Grey hair and bicycles seem quite common here. I guess they are working for NGOs and are now giving the benefit of their expertise to those less fortunate.
These are good examples of successful foreigners in Thailand.
There are lots of successful farangs in Thailand. Some have been very successful in their native countries but decide they want something different in life and move to Thailand.
Others make a success of life after they get to Thailand. Normally the ones who become successful in Thailand do so because they master the language. A few farangs in Thailand even have their own TV shows and are known by Thais throughout the country.
But unfortunately there are a lot of foreigners who fall into the category of idiot. They weren't successful at home and they aren't successful in Thailand. Despite this, they constantly try to 'outdo' other foreigners. What's sad is the way they try to do this.
Here's a quick guide to what impresses me and what doesn't.
What impresses me is real knowledge of the country and real language skills, but be careful. A few years ago in Trang, I watched an American guy living there trying to show off to farangs he thought were all backpackers and tourists.
His Thai was very limited and very bad, but I guess he thought his audience wouldn't know the difference and would be impressed. He spoke loudly so that everyone could hear him. A few of the backpackers might have been impressed but I certainly wasn't.
What doesn't impress me at all is possession of things in Thailand. If you buy a condo in a tacky tourist resort I don't care. If you buy a used Honda CRV and it has tinted glass there is no need to roll the window down when you see me to make sure I can see you.
If you ride a motorbike there is no need to stare with a stupid conceited look as you ride past because I'm just not impressed.
Pedal power is big in Mae Sot. I took a bicycle trishaw ride around town yesterday and lots of people ride bikes. Presumably for many there is no other choice because of their financial situation.
I wish Thais in other areas of Thailand would do the same. In my home town I rarely see a bicycle but there are bloody motorbikes everywhere. For many people a motorbike is their only viable transport option, but they are also used by teenage boys as their main source of entertainment - which is street racing.
These young brats are a menace to themselves and to everyone else, yet the local police do nothing. I really wish the authorities would make a serious effort to clamp down on this obnoxious social problem.
Friday 2nd October 2009
On The Road - Kamphaeng Phet to Mae Sot
Yesterday I was told there are lots of buses going to Mae Sot. I found out this morning there are just two a day at inconvenient times for me. However, I am told there are lots of vans to Mae Sot from Tak.
Bus travel is incredibly cheap in Thailand. The motorbike taxi contraption that took me from my hotel to the bus station cost Bt60 but the fare to Tak from Kamphaeng Phet is just Bt42.
When travelling independently in Thailand you have to be prepared to make lots of small changes to your schedule. A journey might look quite simple on the map but in reality there might be very few transport options.
No problem; I don't need to be anywhere at any time so it really doesn't matter.
On the way to the bus station we passed a sign displaying 24 degrees. This temperature is just about perfect for me but unknown in southern Thailand where I live. Despite having lived in southern Thailand for six years my body just won't acclimatise any further and it is always a little too hot.
The north of Thailand has a cool season, which the south doesn't. What isn't so good is that the north gets hotter in the hot season than the south.
It's raining lightly again this morning, as it was yesterday morning. The rain isn't the kind of tropical rain that drenches you in seconds but, a little like the UK, it's a depressing constant light drizzle.
The motorbike taxi guy was telling me this morning the bad storm that hit the Philippines and moved across to Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos has now arrived in Thailand. Before I left for my trip I heard weather warnings but this is my only window of opportunity to travel so I decided to take my chances.
The road from Tak to Mae Sot winds over lush green mountains and looks as if it could be quite treacherous for those who don't know it. My minivan driver is a very pleasant, jovial person and it seems as if he has been driving this route all his life.
He knows exactly where he can go fast and where he needs to slow down. Before long I have complete confidence in him.
There are many large trucks on this road going between Burma and Thailand. This is what makes European and American sanctions against Burma a joke. Western countries can impose as many sanctions as they wish against the Burmese regime but Asian countries continue to do lots of business with Burma.
After what turned out to be a very boring experience in Kamphaeng Phet, my first impressions of Mae Sot are extremely positive. I feel like a kid on his first trip to Disneyland.
The number of photos I take generally relates to how interesting I find somewhere and during the first hour in Mae Sot I take as many photos as I did all day yesterday in Kamphaeng Phet.
There are Burmese everywhere (easy to spot by the way they dress and the face powder the women wear). Some are Indian and many are Muslim. Everyone is friendly and wants to talk.
In Kamphaeng Phet not many people wanted to speak. People stared but if I smiled back they just averted their gaze and their stony faces remained. Not everyone, but a lot of people. It couldn't be any more different in Mae Sot.
I got talking to a great Burmese guy who has been living in Thailand for over 30 years. His mother was Indian and his father a mix of different races. His father worked for the British army. He spoke excellent English - something that is rare in Thailand. He sells imported jade from Burma which is then carved.
He told me that after 1988 there was a big exodus of Burmese to Thailand and that Mae Sot is booming. He reckons that in three years' time it will be a big tourist destination. I noticed as I came that they are widening the road from Tak.
This is a terrible shame. So many places in Thailand have already been ruined by tourism in Thailand, yet this travesty continues. However, I understand.
There is a direct correlation between tourism and wealth. Kamphaeng Phet gets very few tourists and it remains very poor. Poverty has a smell and I noticed it in Kamphaeng Phet. I hadn't experience that since being up in Isaan.
I asked Mr Ong-Soo from Burma if he has a problem staying in Thailand. He told me no because he was issued a refugee card many years ago. He told me though that newcomers have problems. The minivan this morning stopped at several checkpoints.
Thai immigration didn't even ask to look at my passport. They aren't interested in farangs at all but they are very interested in people who might be illegal immigrants from Burma.
Whenever I get anywhere near the Thai/Burmese border it pours with rain and today is no exception. The good thing is that it isn't hot. The sun is my enemy here and provided it doesn't rain continuously throughout the day, I prefer rain to hot sun.
I'm not sure how to continue my journey. My original plan was to follow the road along the Burma to Mae Hong Son. However, the distance is over 400km and it is a windy, difficult road. The owner of a really nice bakery here warned me against it.
She said the best way is to go to Chiang Mai first and from there go to Mae Hong Son. If I do that though, I will probably decide to go home after Chiang Mai and I will have to leave Mae Hong Son until my next trip to the north-west.
She was telling me about a waterfall in Tak province that is reputedly very beautiful but to get there and back is a two or three day trip. I'm sure it's really good but I don't want to spend all day in a minibus only to get there and come all the way back. I'll leave that one for the backpackers.
It's also possible from here to go over the border into Burma. When I went to the Golden Triangle area of Chiang Rai and did a trip on the Mekong, we visited an island that belongs to Laos.
It was interesting but not somewhere I'd want to spend a whole day. I get the same feeling about a small border village in Burma so I think I will also give that a miss.
Walking around Mae Sot today, it was difficult finding Thai people because everyone is Burmese. They are great people. I'd forgotten about beggars though.
There are quite a few and of course they home in on farang tourists. Some are in a really bad way and you can't help but feel pity. The problem (as I found out before on Thailand's Burmese border, is that once you give money to one, you then attract a crowd.
I don't feel in any danger here but some of the young ragamuffin Burmese boys look a little suspicious. A couple were following me and watching carefully. I just made sure that all my valuables were safely secured about my person and let them know I was aware of their presence. I was told that walking around at night can be dangerous but there is no problem during the daytime.
I think the biggest danger in this area comes from mosquitoes. I spotted a Malaria Prevention Centre earlier, and I know malaria to be a problem on the Thai/Burmese border. Elephantiasis, another mosquito-borne disease, is also endemic around the border areas.
I only bothered with malaria tablets as a tourist and I don't really take any precautions apart from avoidance. It's so difficult though. They are everywhere and you don't always feel the bites. It's only later on when the itching starts that you realise you have been a victim.
The only farangs here seem to be young backpackers. There was one guy though who just didn't look right. There are lots of male farangs of a certain age in Thailand who wander around without showing any interest in the people or the country.
I never see them talking to locals, taking photographs, or paying any attention to anything about Thailand. They walk around on their own staring at the pavement ahead. Of course, there are certain aspects of the country they are interested in but knowing what these are only makes them seem creepier than they actually are.
Sex is for sale absolutely everywhere in Thailand. The only difference is to what extent and how visible it is. In Bangkok and the tourist resorts it is highly visible with large bath-house brothels there for all to see. These places even advertise in the free maps that are handed out to tourists using such euphemisms as Turkish Bath.
In Kamphaeng Phet the bellboy, upon showing a single male farang to his hotel room, offered to deliver a girl to my room - a student, he said. He told me Bt1,500 and I suspect Bt500 goes into his own pocket.
After checking-in at the hotel in Mae Sot, the guy who showed me to my room made me a similar offer. The price was a lot lower at Bt700. I knew that for this price - and in a place that has a large Burmese population - it would have to be a Burmese girl. He confirmed this.
Later in the day, after I arrived back in the hotel following my evening meal, the hotel staff were keen again for me to get a Burmese girl. Presumably they receive a commission. I was told Bt600 for a short time and Bt1,200 for all night. This is a lot less than Thai working girls ask for.
Although technically illegal in Thailand, prostitution is fairly well regulated in most places. The girls need to go for regular checks and can't work if anything is wrong. This even applies to some massage girls.
With girls off the street - and the freelancing Burmese girls in Mae Sot - presumably there is no such regulation. Healthcare in Burma seems almost non-existent, and judging from Burmese teeth, so does dental care. I'd hate to think what STDs these girls have. It's a risk that personally I don't want to take.
I am not at all prudish but what I find slightly disturbing is the Asian obsession with young girls. The Japanese schoolgirl fetish is well-known but it is an Asian-wide thing.
A few years ago, a taxi driver in Hat Yai told me that the police had performed a big operation to get teenage girls off the street. Young girls are very popular with the ethnic Chinese tourists who flock to Hat Yai.
Whenever I've been offered girls on this trip, the guy doing the pimping always stresses the girls are young. The Thai word they use - dek - translates to child, although it doesn't necessarily mean they are children. This use of the word could mean that they are in their early 20's, thus above the age of consent.
As I said though, I just find this all a little disturbing.
Burma is a fascinating country. The gem stone industry is big in Mae Sot and all the gems come from Burma. The guy I met earlier was in the jade business. Mae Sot is full of gem stone shops.
I don't know much about Burma but the WW2 Death Railway built by the Japanese using forced POW labour was built in order to get access to Burmese natural resources. The country is full of natural resources.
Because Burma is so under-developed, there is a lot less human destruction. I have read that there are untouched coral reefs, and forests containing all sorts of wildlife in abundance. I understand there are great beaches and even places where you can ski. Thaksin was very keen to invest in the Burmese tourist industry.
There is a hard-working labour force and English language skills are pretty good. Despite all this, an evil military regime continues to hold the country back. I have never been able to understand how the invasion of Iraq was justified under the name of regime change yet powerful countries have never attempted to change the regimes in Burma and Zimbabwe.
I asked my Burmese friend today if he has hope for Burma. He told me yes because the world is changing quickly. He's right. The Burmese people tried an uprising a few years ago but were beaten back, and monks were murdered. It can only be a matter of time before good prevails over evil.
Thursday 1st October 2009
I set my alarm for 6:30am. When it went off I attempted to snooze for a few minutes but straight away heard that high-pitched whine in my ear that can only mean one thing. I immediately shot up and tried to track down the offender but I couldn't flush it out.
My room is mosquito free and whenever one gets in the room it is a major incident. One of the hazards of travelling in Thailand is that you tend to find mosquitoes wherever you stay.
I head off for the historic park and it turns out to be very impressive. It's a lot like Ayuthaya or Sukothai but without all the tourists. There are about 40 old temples and everything is beautifully kept.
The only people I see are Thais who take care of the temples and a large group of schoolkids from Nakhon Sawan who have arrived in buses. They get quite excited at seeing a farang and we chat for a while.
As I've written about elsewhere, I think the dual pricing system in Thailand is a disgrace. It's just racist. It's based on the assumption that all Thais are poor and all foreigners are rich; therefore the foreigners can afford it.
Well, there are a lot of wealthy Thais and a lot of foreigners in Thailand with little money. In the bank recently I followed a woman who was depositing more money to her account that already had Bt6 million.
You've only got to look at the cars being driven around in Thailand to see that many Thais aren't poor. Yet, I know of farangs having to borrow money each month so they can get through the month.
The Kamphaeng Phet historic park charges Thais Bt20 and foreigners Bt100 - only five times as much. I have my Thai driving license and I can speak a fair amount of Thai so I start questioning this.
I tell them I live and work in Thailand. The woman asks, "Are you a Thai or a foreigner?" In Thailand everything is just black or white with no shades of grey (or brown if referring to skin colour). I tell her I pay taxes and she admits me for Bt20.
My next stop is the National Museum. This time there isn't even a price displayed for Thais. There is simply one price in English for Bt100. I know that Bt100 is a lot for Thais so ask what the Thai price is. They tell me Bt20. We go through the same conversation and I get in for Bt20 again.
Can you imagine if Thais were charged five times as much as locals in London. I wouldn't imagine there would be too many Thai visitors to London.
I know that some farangs don't think this is a problem. Could I afford it? Of course I could, but there is a principle involved.
The Thais know this is basically wrong. That is why at some places they don't display the Thai price, and at others they use Thai numerals. They simply try to hide it.
The historic park and museum were interesting but you can only spend so long doing that kind of thing. I return to the city area and walk around looking for things of interest. There aren't any.
I maintain that Ko Lanta is the greediest place I have ever visited in Thailand and now I have a contender for the most boring place in Thailand - Kamphaeng Phet. I did my best to find something interesting but it was futile. There's nothing.
The farang count was pretty low. One old guy riding a bike looked like he had retired there. I saw a few other guys who, left to their own devices, would never have got to this part of Thailand in a million years.
They were following Thai girls who presumably lived in Kamphaeng. My guess is that they met in a bar in Pattaya and were then told, "You go my home." They were trying to look interested but 'fish out of water' was a bit of an underestimate.
One guy was being led into a motorbike shop by the new-found love of his life. Next stop the gold shop. As I was about to leave, a group of Germans turned up at the hotel.
It was so boring that I ended up in Tesco Lotus looking around, but even that was boring. I was looking for a Wi-Fi connection earlier but couldn't find one. It was so boring that I might have been tempted to start looking at the ThaiVisa forums ... well, maybe not (life could never get that boring).
As I go to bed I am aware that I am sharing my room with a hungry mosquito and that she will probably disturb my sleep. However, by a stroke of luck I see her sitting on a white wall. I creep up and will all my powers of concentration bring my hand down as fast as it will go.
The result is a horrible bloody mess of mosquito parts and human blood but it gives me enormous satisfaction knowing that I will now be able to sleep in peace.
I am looking forward to leaving tomorrow.